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tussock



Joined: May 29, 2011

Post   Posted: Nov 03, 2022 - 07:30 Reply with quote Back to top

T: Season previews, Phillip, remember those?

P: I hear there's a High Elf team in prem again, what are they up against?

Image Season XCIV Premier Division

T: Well, I guess it starts with Orcs in round 1.

Image (1490) [SWL]Dorruks know what league they're in, the SWL. Just as well they wrote it down like that, or they'd have probably forgotten to turn up for prem at all. The shame of this lot, is they didn't hire a Goblin. There's a Goblin's wages going begging in the treasury, there's a troll to throw them with, what's their other one-turn plan? Bushing the Buns up the pitch? Not likely.

P: 5-0 to the Elves, there, can't be otherwise. No grace in an Orc team.

T: That might be a bit ambitious, Phillip, Takeshi has to be a worry, but I don't see them winning without a Goblin.

Image (1490) Minutes or Centuries will come off the game against the Champion Zons with surely a few more skills, but possibly a touch of dented pride. The Amateurs will be hoping they're missing a few Guards and all, taking a short break for the week at least. If they do bring a famous Goblin along, things could get dicey indeed for the High Elves in round 2.

P: The Amateurs have dealt to Bomber every time he's met them, that won't be a problem, and nor will the horrible tall hat men, just too short in the stride to keep up with an elf team, those boys.

T: Could be half an elf team to face them, but, well, Wizards never go astray, or almost never?

Image (1260) Zealots of Change will be looking for a recovery game after the Turbo Wolves tear them up, and round 3 with whatever is left of the High Elfs after a brutal opening might just cut them short of the needed inducements to get one. Either team could turn up here half full of loners, and both teams will bring enough hitting power to worry a lack of bench.

P: Half a team of rats won't worry a full team of Elfs, Terence, not even a challenge! 3-0 at least.

T: Don't forget it's also half a team of Snotlings, and they do horrible things to Elf teams.

P: While losing!

T: True enough.

Image (1330) Pitch Painters get the horrors about facing the Amateurs every time, they may kill one or two each game, and not leave many Elfs for the follow up match, but they've never come close to beating the High Elfs, just paper thin defence. No chance. Still, those old Trolls are going to take their toll, if they've survived the Dorruks leading in, and if they do it early enough, who knows.

P: We know, Terence, same as always, 3-1, if they make their desperate TTM chances.

T: Lets see what the likely depleted Amateurs face, on their homeward run, eh.

Image (1410) [SWL]Mandatory Happiness survived the prem of season 93, and if there's anything left of them after playing footsie with the Minutes or Centuries, well, you know what they say about Dark Elves. Bloody imperialist race-slavers travelling the world looking for easy targets? They won't find one with the Amateurs! Go hunt somewhere else with a few boots to hurry you along!

P: Certainly so, Terence, High Elfs and Dark Elfs play a very different game, on the bloodbowl pitch, and the High Elf one is just better. 3-2 or so, without a doubt.

T: Just a shame there's no chance of Goblins from here.

Image (1400) Blackwater Picaroons will be fresh off tackling the Zealots when they face their greatest challenge of the season in round six. Maleficent will relish the challenge, looking to take her third prem title in a row, a difficult woman to bring down when not surrounded by a highly skilled set of team-mates, let alone as she will be here.

P: Maybe the High Elves will just have to hope someone else has beaten them already. Or, perhaps, they'll be bringing a pair of hard hitting forwards in the form of Buck Shelford and Norm Hewitt.

T: Assuming any of those players survive to round six is this ever-challenging premier division, let alone round seven.

Image (1480) Turbo Wolves will be fresh off monstering the Pitch Painters, and if the Flesh Golems survived that, they'll be annoying for the High Elves to deal with, along with the rest of them. It's their lack of back up ball carriers has held them from the title the last couple times, but they've been in it to the end each go, and this could well be a championship decider against the High Elves to finish.

P: 2-1 to the High Elves, near-perfect season, what could go wrong, prem rings for the survivors.

T: Which team those rings will go to is anyone's guess really, as much as these High Elves can win any game, winning every game has proven difficult.

Image (1440) Amateur Professionals come in off the back of a comfortable conference win with a rookie thrower and a few storied favourites to take on the best the SWL has to offer. No one here is beyond them, and every team will fear this match up. They might just fear one or two themselves, but such is the modern game.

P: What? Where's the superstar thrower? Terence?

T: Listen, I asked the coach, apparently a lot of money went missing in the post-season party scene, and Bruce Deans has not been seen since that night.

P: Oh, no. How could he take the team's cash instead of play for a Prem ring? What is going on!

T: It makes no sense to me, Phillip, but I guess some people are just assholes.

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Balle2000



Joined: Sep 25, 2008

Post   Posted: Dec 10, 2022 - 20:22 Reply with quote Back to top

Image

Arnie: Hey Ivan, did you catch that Blood Bowl game yesterday between the Black Lagoon Go-Go Bar and the Albion Itinerants?

Ivan: I sure did, Arnie. What a thrilling game it was!

Arnie: Definitely. The humans took an early lead with a touchdown by Jeremy Calonet; the Nurgle team just ignored him! They fought back hard, though.

Ivan: That's right, Arnie. The young Pestigor Riphammer Maggotspike charged through the human defense like they were made of tissue paper and scored two touchdowns of his own.

Arnie: And let's not forget esteemed guest Lord Borak's impact on the game. He fouled and knocked out several human players, causing chaos and confusion on the field.

Ivan: And he even permanently niggled the Ogre Drin, who had to be carried off the field with a very displeased look on his face. Talk about a real ogre-sized upset!

Arnie: The Nurgle team celebrated their victory with a raucous post-game party at the Go-Go Bar. I heard they had some creepy crawly appetizers and a maggot-covered cake.

Ivan: Meanwhile, the humans went home to lick their wounds and cry themselves to sleep. It was a good game of Blood Bowl.


Black Lagoon 2 - 1 Albion Itinerants
Irgy



Joined: Feb 21, 2007

Post   Posted: Jan 25, 2023 - 13:32 Reply with quote Back to top

A: It's time for the player awards for season XCIV!

B: Why are you telling me that Alice? I know that already.

A: It's about dialogue Bob. That's the format here. I talk, you talk, I talk.

B: But why?

A: I don't know why. But everyone does it. Just run with it for goodness sake.

B: And anyway it's not time, they should have been done a week ago.

A: Yes, well, they're done now anyway. Let's start with who kicked the most mud in the mudkicker division!

Image Image Liverpool Lass (We Come From A Land Up Over) 10 touchdowns
Image Image Twelve of Sixteen ([SWL] Invasion Cube 001) 7 casualties
Image Image Liverpool Lass (We Come From A Land Up Over) 185 rushing yards
Image Image Avro Lancaster (Isilmë Bombers) 14 passing yards
Image Image Decapitated Coffee (Malapropisms Relieved) 18 fouls
Image Image Twelve of Sixteen ([SWL] Invasion Cube 001) 65 blocks
Image Image Avro Lancaster & Image Zorre Sandwave (Isilmë Bombers & Sunnyside Gardens) 7 completions
Image Image Six of Sixteen ([SWL] Invasion Cube 001) 1.67 block / cas
Image Image Oniar Wilrow (Sunnyside Gardens) 6 pass / cp
Image Image Liverpool Lass (We Come From A Land Up Over) 34 SPP

A: Liverpool Lass showing everyone how to get a triple award: Pick up the ball, run it down the other end of the field, and score with it.

B: It's a lesson some players in higher grades could really use.

A: Meanwhile the hitty awards go to the most well justified violation of naming policy imaginable!

B: Yes, if ever you wanted to have a theme without having a theme at all you couldn't do much better than this team.

A: Clearly the lack of theme allowed him to focus on what was important: Getting into a frenzy and making blocks.

B: And completions are shared between two identical looking players.

A: Is it really a pass when it goes an average of 2 yards? I think these guys are only passing because they get a reroll compared to a gfi + handoff.

B: They get a what? This isn't Order of the Stick here we don't live the game mechanics Alice

A: Sorry!

B: Props to Avro for taking it even with another player on the team sharing the role. Though he gets the bronze arrow with a frankly pathetic 14 yards, so I guess that balances out.

A: Let's move on to the technically most tightly contested divison for these awards, with 20 teams, Conference.

Image Image Rebecca Razzia (Albion Itinerants) 8 touchdowns
Image Image Bakari (Ophidian Infidels) 10 casualties
Image Image Howitzero (Weapons of Maths Destruction) 152 rushing yards
Image Image Aovan Cord (Ligna Ludis) 19 passing yards
Image Image Geordie S (New Blacktown Expatriates) 42 fouls
Image Image Parker Ust (Albion Itinerants) 75 blocks
Image Image Aovan Cord (Ligna Ludis) 8 completions
Image Image Nuru (Ophidian Infidels) 3 block / cas
Image Image Cankles (New Blacktown Expatriates) 10 pass / cp
Image Image Rebecca Razzia (Albion Itinerants) 28 SPP

A: Rebecca Razzia again shows that scoring touchdowns is the shortest path to most SPP as well.

B: So, rumour has it we tried to apply some fancy statistics on the block per cas and pass per completion stats. Trying to avoid it going to some lame cas from one block kind of player. What came of that?

A: Well the upshot was, the best two players for block per cas were Morg and Thorg.

B: Sounds like that stats worked then.

A: Sure, but it wasn't really what we wanted. Meanwhile no amount of adjustment was ever going to stop the pass per completion going to a single-completion candidate

B: Maybe we could rename it to "Best Pass"?

A: In the end we decided to just eyeball it. Any complaints please send to the snotling love hotline.

Image Image Giuseppe Garibaldi (Zealots of Change) touchdowns
Image Image Buck Shelford (Amateur Professionals) 8 casualties
Image Image Maleficent Lenestar (c) (Blackwater Picaroons) 129 rushing yards
Image Image Carrot Ironfoundersson (Zealots of Change) 30 passing yards
Image Image Electric Indigo (Pitch Painters) 31 fouls
Image Image Buck Shelford (Amateur Professionals) 86 blocks
Image Image Carrot Ironfoundersson & Image Ant Strachan (Zealots of Change & Amateur Professionals) 7 completions
Image Image Gilbert 5 (SWL Dorruks) 5.6 block / cas
Image Image Stan Gable 4 (SWL Dorruks) 5 pass / cp
Image Image Natalia Gunther (Blackwater Picaroons) 23 SPP

A: Natalia the upstart linewoman pretending to be a blitzer rides 2 mvps to narrowly beat 4 players on just one less SPP, including a real blitzer from her own team.

B: At least this division it's a player who played in both camps, with a touchdown to complement the casualties.

A: Completions on the other hand is less contested, shared at one per game between the only two players in the whole tournament to even bother passing the ball.

B: At least some slightly more respectable passing yards between them compared to the jokers in conference.

A: An elf takes out most blocks and most cas, approaching double the nearest contender in the blocks department.

B: When an elf wins the golden shield and knuckles you know there's a good chance it's the winning team.

A: Maleficient Lenestar has an impressive 129 rushing yards for just 4 touchdowns (and no completions).

B: Makes me want to make a new award, the Golden Retriever, for running around with the ball without taking it anywhere.

A: A dog of an award that would be.

B: And with that, it's a wrap.

A: Wait, what happened to most turns?

B: You want an award for showing up?

A: Well, there used to be one.

B: Rest assured, all players, or their surviving family, have an individual certificate of participation coming in the mail.
Irgy



Joined: Feb 21, 2007

Post   Posted: Apr 05, 2023 - 14:37 Reply with quote Back to top

D: Hi, this is Dolly the sheep

D: And this is Dolly the sheep

D: But I'm the famous one

D: I'm the original!

D: Exactly, you were just an ordinary sheep until I came along. And you still are really.

D: Well then so are you.

D: No, I may be exactly the same, but I'm special.

D: Yeah you're special alright. Let's just get one with this. It's time for the regional awards.

Image Image Rosses (Stolen Golem) 9 touchdowns
Image Image Brantley Blacksoul (Questionable Ethics) 6 casualties
Image Image Rosses (Stolen Golem) 196 rushing yards
Image Image Flinch (Theo packrats) 35 passing yards
Image Image Bahiti (Ophidian Infidels) 15 fouls
Image Image Tuckerbag Jumbuck (Billabong Blue Bloods) 82 blocks
Image Image Avro Lancaster (Isilmë Bombers) 10 completions
Image Image Mo Treem (Billabong Blue Bloods) 7/2 block / cas
Image Image Consolidated Liberator (Isilmë Bombers) 10/1 pass / cp
Image Image Rosses (Stolen Golem) 31 SPP

D: Only one regional this season, making it something of a soft option like Prem, but without the prestige.

D: Kind of like you then.

D: Rosses from Stolen Golem takes out the bronze cross, mostly via the "touchdowns" strategy, but it must be said wouldn't have been the clear leader without the 2 cas to balance it out.

D: The one trick pony award goes to Avro Lancaster, 10 completions 10 SPP.

Image Image Atlas (Styx and Warpstones) 13 touchdowns
Image Image Seedling Bill Bush (Motherstone Connection) 13 casualties
Image Image Atlas (Styx and Warpstones) 212 rushing yards
Image Image Damon & Image Carole Landis III (Styx and Warpstones & Skye Babes) 10 passing yards
Image Image Electric Indigo (Pitch Painters) 29 fouls
Image Image Thanatos (Styx and Warpstones) 88 blocks
Image Image Damon (Styx and Warpstones) 10 completions
Image Image Seedling Bill Bush (Motherstone Connection) 75/13 block / cas
Image Image Rocky III (Zealots of Change) 10/1 pass / cp
Image Image Atlas (Styx and Warpstones) 43 SPP

D: A dominant performance from Underworld overall.

D: I think there's something in the fact that there's one gutter runner to do the running, whereas a skaven gutter runner has three teammates to share the limelight with. Similarly one blitzer, one thrower.

D: And only one troll to take the passing yards per completion award.

D: Wait, what?

D: They're also a strong team that's doing well in the current meta.

D: It's worth a little explanation how we're awarding the cas/block award. The award went to Seedling Bill Bush with 13 cas from 75 blocks, which is 5.77 blocks per cas. However, there were other players with better raw ratios, and indeed a full suite of options 31/7, 18/5, 10/4, 8/3, 3/2. The question is, which of those is actually more impressive?

D: Well you said already, 75/13. But why?

D: Right, yes, the real question is why. So, first we took the overall blocks and cas for the three conferences, 5844/383, and used that as the base chance of getting a casualty from a block. Then we ask the question, who is most convincingly better than that?

D: You keep answering questions with questions

D: Do I? Well we answered this question with the question of who, with that base casualty rate, would have to have been the luckiest to get that many casualties. In order words, who best disproved the null hypothesis that it's all random and there's no skills involved. 3/2, while better than anyone in prem, could have lucked their way into it at the base rate with probability 0.012, i.e. 1.2%. This turns out to be similar to 8/3, but 18/5 is more impressive at 0.0050, while 75/13 smashes them at 0.0011

D: Can we do the same for pass / cp?

D: Not exactly, because it's not a sucesses per attempt situation. It's hard to make any kind of argument for what's "more impressive", especially when failed attempts aren't in the mix at all. This one is basically always dominated by one desperate pass, and I don't think that needs to change.

Image Image Kate 'The Klaw' Chaney (Turbo Wolves) 7 touchdowns
Image Image Wormser III & Image Buttercup (SWL Dorruks & Flower Beard) 5 casualties
Image Image Kate 'The Klaw' Chaney (Turbo Wolves) 108 rushing yards
Image Image Josh Kronfeild (Amateur Professionals) 46 passing yards
Image Image Mr. Skolnick 5 (SWL Dorruks) 17 fouls
Image Image Kate 'The Klaw' Chaney (Turbo Wolves) 53 blocks
Image Image Josh Kronfeild (Amateur Professionals) 12 completions
Image Image Paul Dillet (Sun's out, Guns out!) 4/2 block / cas
Image Image Chloe the Cruel (Turbo Wolves) 10 pass / cp
Image Image Kate 'The Klaw' Chaney (Turbo Wolves) 33 SPP

D: Prem's awards are dominated by Kate 'The Klaw' Chaney, winning spp by a margin of 14, with just 1 mvp in the mix.

D: Wouldn't mind seeing her in some sheep's clothing!

D: Wasn't enough to keep the team up however. Goes to show the importance of team play. The winners, in comparison, barely scraped a mention in the awards, with just a dubious award for 2 cas from 4 blocks.

D: Is that really good enough?

D: Well it's p=0.016, compared to p=0.026 for Buttercup's 5 from 32. It is technically harder to do.

D: Well he took as good as he gave, suffering two casualties himself in about as many blocks against him.

D: The second of which killed him, and came from the other dubious, ratio-based award winner Chloe the Cruel.

D: Put's Seedling Bill Bush's 13 cas efforts in conference in perspective when the best anyone can muster in Premier is a tie on 5 for the season.

D: Well that's it for me, I've got lots to do being so famous and all.

D: And by that you mean eating some grass and going to sleep don't you?

D: You know me all too well. For some reason.
JPM



Joined: Oct 02, 2015

Post   Posted: Apr 08, 2023 - 04:32 Reply with quote Back to top

200th Game for Styx and Warpstones

Styx & Warpstones https://fumbbl.com/p/team?team_id=1050146

On the 6th September, 2016 a young rookie team took the field, led by a rat called Volos. 2405 days later, with Volos long retired, the third iteration of the franchise takes the field for the 200th time. Entering in SWL’s Season 66 where Dlock’s Wood Elves held off the Slumbering Skinks, Wäŋa Warriors and SWL Fun Police for Premiership Glory, the Underworld made a modest start finishing 5th in their opening regional campaign. The CRP era was hard, never finishing higher than 6th in Conferences, but undeterred the UW persistent. After the departure of the Southern Warpstone Scavengers coached by Almic85 in Season 69, Styx and Warpstones were the sole flag bearers for 20 seasons until joined by Haru Haru’s Zealots of Change in the BB20 era in Season 89. While the near miss of the Premiership title in Season 85 was a tough one to take at the time, the success in Prem in Season 91 has certainly been the teams crowning glory. I looked at “the Challenge” set by Almic in his Underworld team’s bio the other day, a list of goals that seemed unobtainable back in the CRP days. While the team’s players and composition has changed over the three different editions, and looks so different to the days of CRP, the team has never failed to be one of the most fun and entertaining teams to play week in, week out. Happy 200th Boys!

Highlights of 200 games in SWL:

• First Season – Season 66
• First Underworld Legend in SWL – Volos
• First Underworld Team into SWL Premier Division – Season 77
• First Underworld Conference Title in SWL – Season 84
• First Underworld Premier Title in SWL – Season 91
• Premiership Appearances – Six (qualified for Prem eight times)
• Titles – Premiership – 1; Conferences – 2
• Most SPP Per Position in SWL – Thrower (Hermes - 126), Troll (Cerberus - 71), Gutter Runner (Aeneas - 200), Blitzer (Salamoneus - 291)
• 10 SWL All Star Players
• Most All Star Scrolls: Salamoneus – 8
• Team Legends: Volos, Salamoneus, Aeneas, Cronus, Atlas and Thanatos.

Overall: 28 Seasons, Played: 199 Won: 73 Drew: 49 Lost: 77 (48.99 Win %)
Wozzaa



Joined: Apr 23, 2016

Post   Posted: Nov 05, 2023 - 04:33 Reply with quote Back to top

[img width="150"]https://fumbbl.com/i/721683[/img]
Moonrakers Get first Win of Season

After a disappointing start to the season, the Moonrakers were able to scrape a 1-0 victory.

Pouring rain meant the ball was as slippery as Old Gurtrudes Jellied Eels, and both teams struggled with ball handling. The rain also seemed to effect the rough stuff, with neither side causing any permanent damage on the other.

The moment of the game was caused by a handling error by the Khorne receiver allowing a swarm of Halflings to surround the ball. This led to a scramble which ended up in the arms of a Halfling in the end zone.

Puggy Baconbreath made an appearance for the Moonrakers for the first time much to the delight of the drenched fling fans.

The expected casualties didn't come for the Halflings, which meant they were able to swarm on the ball like a pack of pot-bellied flies around a turd to close the game out.

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Irgy



Joined: Feb 21, 2007

Post   Posted: Jan 29, 2024 - 13:37 Reply with quote Back to top

Season XCVIII Twanhlows, brought to you by Mr Getitdone. Tell me Mr Getitdone, how do you get so many things actually done?

"Well, the trick is, to just get on with it."

Well, let's do that then. Though I do want to make one note about our 8 passing yards from 0 completions record. I looked into it, it was an inaccurate pass, scattered N, SW, E, caught by the intended recipient. Passing yards credited, completion not credited. A bug or a feature? You decide. I figure it's just the sort of noteworthy outlier these awards are for. Also 8/1 would still have won the category in any case.

Image Image Magenta (Horror of Horrorz) 11 touchdowns
Image Image Stella Greenblade (Ahuriri Unearthly) 11 casualties
Image Image Andrj Carnegie (Stoutheart Philanthropists) 153 rushing yards
Image Image Hawker Typhoon (Isilmë Bombers) 36 passing yards
Image Image Urim Mummyshield (Seppotonian Blorcs) 27 fouls
Image Image Tunuckal (UnderRatted) & Image Murag Trollbasher (Seppotonian Blorcs) 66 blocks
Image Image Hawker Typhoon (Isilmë Bombers) 13 completions
Image Image Stella Greenblade (Ahuriri Unearthly) 11/59 (=5.36) block / cas
Image Image Rarra (UnderRatted) 15/3 (=5) pass / cp
Image Image Magenta (Horror of Horrorz) 41 SPP

Image Image Carlos Spencer (Amateur Professionals) 12 touchdowns
Image Image Estoctagonal (Weapons of Maths Destruction) 10 casualties
Image Image Mutgusk (Bronzed Raiders) 137 rushing yards
Image Image Josh Kronfeild (Amateur Professionals) 133 passing yards
Image Image Aniyah Miller (Run of the Millers) 22 fouls
Image Image Nezumi Shortfang (Believe in Swarming) 66 blocks
Image Image Josh Kronfeild (Amateur Professionals) 19 completions
Image Image Ulric Palehawk (Killer Heelz) 2/2 (=1) block / cas
Image Image Alakas Snaketongue (Perfectionists Of Excess) 8/0 (=∞) pass / cp
Image Image Carlos Spencer (Amateur Professionals) 36 SPP

Image Image OMEGA (Minutes or Centuries) 6 touchdowns
Image Image The Cleaner (Nana's Undies) 8 casualties
Image Image Ball Bagger (Nana's Undies) 136 rushing yards
Image Image 4-Ecks Gold (Billabong Blue Bloods) 8 passing yards
Image Image Gracefield (GG Luckers) 37 fouls
Image Image Sandman (Minutes or Centuries) 76 blocks
Image Image Beyonce (Suspicious A-Listers) 3 completions
Image Image Paleo (Minutes or Centuries) 5/26 (=5.2) block / cas
Image Image 4-Ecks Gold (Billabong Blue Bloods) 8/1 (=8 ) pass / cp
Image Image The Cleaner (Nana's Undies) 24 SPP
Irgy



Joined: Feb 21, 2007

Post   Posted: Mar 19, 2024 - 09:57 Reply with quote Back to top

Alpha: Hey everybody! It's time to party like it's season 99!
Beta: You know that song was about an upcoming apocalypse not a cool NYE party right?
Alpha: Well let's see how season 100 goes before deciding which one's right!
Beta: Regionals this season we have casualties tied with touchdowns, and fouls tied with passing yards in the numbers.

Image Image Todd Charnel (Crypt-Buried Raiders) 8 touchdowns
Image Image Grace Gwathard (Let Slip the Dogs of War) 8 casualties
Image Image Todd Charnel (Crypt-Buried Raiders) 159 rushing yards
Image Image Rarra (UnderRatted) 34 passing yards
Image Image Shamob Ogresnake (Seppotonian Blorcs) 34 fouls
Image Image Aliyah Celise (Let Slip the Dogs of War) 63 blocks
Image Image Rarra (UnderRatted) 5 completions
Image Image Dumag Elfstream (Da Smash Mashas) 28/6 block / cas
Image Image KlickKlick (UnderRatted) 6/1 pass / cp
Image Image Todd Charnel (Crypt-Buried Raiders) 32 SPP

Alpha: Conference lives up to the hype and outdoes regionals on every metric except fouling.
Beta: Yes a below par performance from Gracefield all told, 8 less than last season, but still enough to carry the category.
Alpha: Omega (love the name but damned if I'm shouting it) is the bull with the balls, taking TDs, rushing, and SPP.
Beta: But clearly only the air filled variety, just one casualty from a St4 player.
Alpha: Ulithi Bardar manages to tie on completions with just 2 passing yards all season. Are we sure he knows which way his team is even running?
Beta: Makes you wonder how many of those were even on the play.
Alpha: Silver shield to a tree, a good effort to make a lot of blocks without taking root and getting lonely.
Beta: A small rooted tree that one for sure.

Image Image OMEGA (Minutes or Centuries) 12 touchdowns
Image Image Desmond 'The Beast' Wulf (Turbo Wolves) 13 casualties
Image Image OMEGA (Minutes or Centuries) 215 rushing yards
Image Image Hawker Typhoon (Isilmë Bombers) 46 passing yards
Image Image Gracefield (GG Luckers) 29 fouls
Image Image Shadowleaf (Munchausen Moonrakers) 80 blocks
Image Image Ulithi Bardar (Loco Turkeys) & Image Hawker Typhoon (Isilmë Bombers) 8 completions
Image Image Ushamph Treeseer (SWL Dorruks) 6/3 block / cas
Image Image Caitlin Wood (Kiwi Mountain Kings) 8/1 pass / cp
Image Image OMEGA (Minutes or Centuries) 42 SPP

Alpha: And finally Premier, where nothing was unexpected.
Beta: Yes, the elves take all the passing and touchdown categories.
Alpha: A chaos beastman takes both cas categories.
Beta: And an underworld snotling takes the fouls.
Alpha: The superghoul endlessly runs the ball down the field to no real avail.
Beta: And we're just left with the golden shield, which could go to anyone, but this time went to a hard working jaguar warrior blocker.

Image Image Carlos Spencer (Amateur Professionals) 13 touchdowns
Image Image Brantley Blacksoul (Questionable Ethics) 8 casualties
Image Image Ball Bagger (Nana's Undies) 147 rushing yards
Image Image Josh Kronfeild (Amateur Professionals) 83 passing yards
Image Image Many Pinata (Believe in Swarming) 36 fouls
Image Image Dolores Lenestar (c) (Blackwater Picaroons) 72 blocks
Image Image Josh Kronfeild (Amateur Professionals) 11 completions
Image Image Brantley Blacksoul (Questionable Ethics) 55/8 block / cas
Image Image Josh Kronfeild (Amateur Professionals) 83/11 pass / cp
Image Image Carlos Spencer (Amateur Professionals) 45 SPP
Irgy



Joined: Feb 21, 2007

Post   Posted: Jun 13, 2024 - 14:25 Reply with quote Back to top

C1: Hi, I'm half of Bicentennial Man.

C2: And I'm the other half.

C1: Making each of us one Centennial Man.

C2: Here to celebrate 100 seasona of SWL.

C1: It's a league that just keeps on going and going, a bit like our movie.

C2: And in honor of carrying on for a long time, the "turning up" award is back. In regionals it goes to a tree. They might not do much but they also sure as heck aren't going anywhere.

C1: I hear they live for even longer than we did.

C2: Only because we chose to become human.

C1: And on the topic of extended lifetimes, a good showing from vampires across three separate teams

C2: Robots want to be mortal humans, humans want to be immortal vampires, I guess the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.

C1: If you're a tree you'll never cross that fence though.

C2: Until one day, you become the fence.

C1: Just before we move on a special mention to Caleb Nyota who's the first player in a while to take the bronze (or any colour) arm with more than one actual completion, a consistent effort of throwing the ball in the right direction.

Image Image Mckenna Elsa (Southern Spoons) & Image Meassiles (Snotballers) 7 touchdowns
Image Image Cernon Wendell (Brunswick Munchers) 11 casualties
Image Image Totara (Southern Spoons) 113 turns
Image Image Legneck Can't-Stop-Won't-Stop-Bouncing (Lobrot Asylum) 156 rushing yards
Image Image Penelope Gortin (Southern Spoons) & Image Fraderk Aswang (Brunswick Munchers) 28 passing yards
Image Image Blitzophrenia (Snotballers) 22 fouls
Image Image Kraxak (Phin Lizzies) 76 blocks
Image Image Katniss (Anything but Twilight) 11 completions
Image Image Cernon Wendell (Brunswick Munchers) 11/62 cas / block
Image Image Caleb Nyota (Hostile Kiddies) 17/3 pass / cp
Image Image Upatisya Upeksa (Custodes Centenarius) 30 SPP

C1: Bzaarharr demonstrates to everyone what happens if you leave a bull centaur on the pitch the whole time.

C2: Conference finds itself with the lowest casualties but the most fouls, a rough place to be on the ground.

Image Image Bzaa'rharr (Bronzed Raiders) 10 touchdowns
Image Image Interesteyr (Weapons of Maths Destruction) 7 casualties
Image Image Bzaa'rharr (Bronzed Raiders) & Image Nathaniel Dokoran (Bloodwolf Bandits) 112 turns
Image Image Bzaa'rharr (Bronzed Raiders) 181 rushing yards
Image Image Rarra (UnderRatted) 23 passing yards
Image Image Pamela Puckerupp (Dino STOMP) 29 fouls
Image Image Dolores Lenestar (c) (Blackwater Picaroons) 65 blocks
Image Image Rarra (UnderRatted) 9 completions
Image Image Interesteyr (Weapons of Maths Destruction) 7/41 cas / block
Image Image Liandrin Lenestar (Blackwater Picaroons) 10/1 pass / cp
Image Image Bzaa'rharr (Bronzed Raiders) 30 SPP

C1: The champions really showing everyone how it's done, with both werewolves covering the two key aspects of play, and even their ghoul making a showing on the passing front.

C2: But the real stand out is Cerulean blue, making a statistically impossible 2 casualties from literally 0 blocks. How did this even happen?

C1: It was thanks to a prayer the Nuffle, the casualties were actually from fouls, but they still count. Maybe they shouldn't but no better time to celebrate breaking my spreadsheet.

Image Image Kate, Return of the Klaw (Turbo Wolves) 8 touchdowns
Image Image Desmond 'The Beast' Wulf (Turbo Wolves) 13 casualties
Image Image Desmond 'The Beast' Wulf (Turbo Wolves) & Image Pregnant Applause (Malapropisms Relieved) & Image Wormser 7 (SWL Dorruks) 111 turns
Image Image Ghoragdush Treebone (SWL Dorruks) 160 rushing yards
Image Image Charlotte Rose (Turbo Wolves) 6 passing yards
Image Image Shadow Clown (Malapropisms Relieved) & Image Dean Ulich 4 (SWL Dorruks) 20 fouls
Image Image Sandman (Minutes or Centuries) 73 blocks
Image Image Crypt Rat (Believe in Swarming) 2 completions
Image Image Cerulean blue (Pitch Painters) 2/0 cas / block
Image Image Charlotte Rose (Turbo Wolves) 6/1 pass / cp
Image Image Desmond 'The Beast' Wulf (Turbo Wolves) 33 SPP

C1: Well that's a wrap. Centennial man and Centennial man signing out. We'll get back together and maybe see you in another 100 seasons when we can fall in love with your grandchildren.
Irgy



Joined: Feb 21, 2007

Post   Posted: Aug 13, 2024 - 11:21 Reply with quote Back to top

Irgy: Welcome to the season CI Twanhlows!

Irgy: This is coach Irgy speaking as myself for a change, and joined by my childhood invisible friend Podem.

Podem: You say that like you don't still talk to me...

Irgy: Shush. Moving on to regionals, the bronze knuckledusters looks like it's the heart, in that it's split three ways between including two trees and a troll.

Podem: It's the fact that it's a miserable 7 cas is why so many are sharing it.

Irgy: Yeah. It's the number of cas you get by just turning up for 113 turns and/or making 72 blocks...

Image Image Derilac Dewfoot (SWL - Fitzroy Fryers Club) 10 touchdowns
Image Image The Old Oak (SWL - Fitzroy Fryers Club) & Image Auntyshape Grumbleflick (Lobrot Asylum) & Image Totara (Southern Spoons) 7 casualties
Image Image The Old Oak (SWL - Fitzroy Fryers Club) 113 turns
Image Image Crownie (Beer on Ice) 149 rushing yards
Image Image Cesare Borgia (Romagna Regals) 21 passing yards
Image Image The Second Coming Of Thunderfoot Imposticator (Lobrot Asylum) 22 fouls
Image Image Hope Beyla (Southern Spoons) & Image Auntyshape Grumbleflick (Lobrot Asylum) 72 blocks
Image Image Cesare Borgia (Romagna Regals) 7 completions
Image Image Inifinite Growth (Capitalism Ho!) 5/17 cas / block
Image Image Penelope Gortin (Southern Spoons) 13/3 pass / cp
Image Image Dís Hiǫrleifrdóttir (Baerson Blood Eagles) 32 SPP

Irgy: Conference is dominated by the "other" necro team, with their 7-0-0 result and 5 Twanhlows, including a nice 30spp zero mvp season from Stella Greenblade. A team to watch next season.

Podem: Necro overpowered?

Irgy: Some controversy on the cas/block award. When I eyeballed it, I thought it would go to my own little one-turner with 3 cas from 5 blocks. Was a bit of a shock since I didn't even notice he'd been making blocks. But I thought I'd better run the stats (especially since it's my own player), and it turns out 12/61 is actually pretty damned good. Compare that to the results in regionals and premier, it was a good performance

Podem: It's kind of dull when it goes to the same player as the knuckledusters.

Irgy: It is, but usually it's deserved even so. In any case if it was passed on it would go to a different player again, who would have won both awards in any other division but was living in Stella's shadow in conference this season.

Podem: Moving on, humans and chaos take the passing awards, where are the elves?

Irgy: There's a distinct shortage of elves in the entire league right now. Rumour has it that elf players have gone soft.

Podem: Gone soft?

Image Image Bryce Gvene (Ahuriri Unearthly) 9 touchdowns
Image Image Stella Greenblade (Ahuriri Unearthly) 12 casualties
Image Image Benny Stout (Dino STOMP) & Image Slaalek Swiftclaw (Perfectionists Of Excess) 114 turns
Image Image Bryce Gvene (Ahuriri Unearthly) 176 rushing yards
Image Image Boudicca (Warriors of Reknown) 39 passing yards
Image Image Pamela Puckerupp (Dino STOMP) 28 fouls
Image Image Miramar (GG Luckers) 69 blocks
Image Image Boudicca (Warriors of Reknown) 9 completions
Image Image Stella Greenblade (Ahuriri Unearthly) 12/61 cas / block
Image Image Charlie Caelholdt (Bloodwolf Bandits) 10/1 pass / cp
Image Image Stella Greenblade (Ahuriri Unearthly) 30 SPP

Irgy: In Premier, we could almost forget the champs were even in the comp, until they finally made a showing for a single clutch werewolf pass. It was a game winning pass though at least (I checked), not just some gratuitous turn 16 spp farming nonsense like I was worried it might be.

Podem: What's the story with Morg making an appearance?

Irgy: Yeah so Morg often technically wins this category, and normally I ignore him. But this time it's a combination of two things. Firstly, he came fourth overall for total casualties in just that one game (every game he's in he's counted as a separate player). He's not just one of (or in fact, many of) the noisy 1 or 2 cas from a handful of blocks down the bottom of the list like he usually is, he's the most convincing winner I've seen in this category. Secondly, everyone else's performance was quite piss-poor this season so I don't really feel like anyone deserving is particularly missing out as a result. I'll try not to make a habit of giving this one to Morg though.

Podem: Who would have got it otherwise?

Irgy: Well I checked by deleting Morg's entry, and there was one other row with a respectable result. It was Morg, with 4 cas from 8 blocks, in another game...

Podem: An orc blitzer for rush and touchdowns, a dwarf for passing yards, again, where were the elves?

Irgy: They at least picked up completions.

Podem: A nice balanced effort from Liandrin Lenestar with 4 touchdowns, 7 cas, and no mvps.

Irgy: Turns continues to annoy me as the category most likely to make more work for me with a tie, this time three ways, and including both trees from the Flings team.

Image Image Equilaterail Gun (Weapons of Maths Destruction) 6 touchdowns
Image Image Sandman (Minutes or Centuries) 8 casualties
Image Image Equilaterail Gun (Weapons of Maths Destruction) & Image Andres Walter & Mateo Hestophes (Half Off Cheapskates) 113 turns
Image Image Equilaterail Gun (Weapons of Maths Destruction) 155 rushing yards
Image Image Charity Stoutheart (Stoutheart Philanthropists) 11 passing yards
Image Image Ushamph Treeseer (SWL Dorruks) 18 fouls
Image Image Liandrin Lenestar (Blackwater Picaroons) 62 blocks
Image Image Madhi Wreapblade (Clar Garond Buzwalis) 5 completions
Image Image Morg 'n' Thorg (Half Off Cheapskates) 5/10 cas / block
Image Image Kate, Return of the Klaw (Turbo Wolves) 10/1 pass / cp
Image Image Liandrin Lenestar (Blackwater Picaroons) 26 SPP

Irgy: And that's a wrap, any feedback please submit in writing to the metal box marked "garbage".

Podem: Want a game of chess?

Irgy: I've told you before, chess doesn't work against myself. You can join my next civ game though...
Irgy



Joined: Feb 21, 2007

Post   Posted: Dec 11, 2024 - 10:19 Reply with quote Back to top

Season CII Twanhlows

Regionals

There's no bronze arm because nobody deserved it. The 1/0 block/cas is recognising a new way of breaking the system - it was a cas from a defensive block. No real surprises otherwise but well done to Muzza for the triple.

Image Image Muzza (Nudgee Budgies) 12 touchdowns
Image Image Auntyshape Grumbleflick (Lobrot Asylum) 8 casualties
Image Image Webke (Carroburg Canetoads) 112 turns
Image Image Muzza (Nudgee Budgies) 204 rushing yards
Image Image Isabel Jiménez (Principalia of Intramuros) 3 passing yards
Image Image Thunderthought Improsticanator Marrowflex (Lobrot Asylum) 31 fouls
Image Image Mutt (Nudgee Budgies) 73 blocks
Image Image Giovanni Gwyddno (Earls Earls Earls) 6 completions
Image Image Snotty Stilettos (Hawk Tuah Snotballers) 1/0 cas / block
Image Image Muzza (Nudgee Budgies) 47 SPP

Conference

Three way tie for turns on exactly 16x7, two from the same team. Nice to see a halfling getting the big prize.

Image Image Derilac Dewfoot (SWL - Fitzroy Fryers Club) 16 touchdowns
Image Image Leonardo (Pitch Painters) & Image Sandman (Minutes or Centuries) 10 casualties
Image Image Kaye Osborne-Annbrid (Blackwater Picaroons) & Image Temperance Stoutheart (Stoutheart Philanthropists) & Image Dolores Lenestar (c) (Blackwater Picaroons) 112 turns
Image Image Equilaterail Gun (Weapons of Maths Destruction) 222 rushing yards
Image Image Cesare Borgia (Romagna Regals) 46 passing yards
Image Image Heretaunga (GG Luckers) 26 fouls
Image Image Perseus (Styx and Warpstones) 78 blocks
Image Image Damon (Styx and Warpstones) 10 completions
Image Image Leonardo (Pitch Painters) 10/52 cas / block
Image Image Projectile Vomit (Snotballers) 43/7 pass / cp
Image Image Derilac Dewfoot (SWL - Fitzroy Fryers Club) 52 SPP

Premier

Not much to note on these, but good to see most teams getting something.

Image Image Magenta (Horror of Horrorz) 11 touchdowns
Image Image Shoe Me The Way (Malapropisms Relieved) 8 casualties
Image Image Oddi Geirþiólfrson (Norsicles) 112 turns
Image Image Bryce Gvene (Ahuriri Unearthly) 192 rushing yards
Image Image Kublai Khan (Warriors of Reknown) 39 passing yards
Image Image The Turtle Package (Malapropisms Relieved) 17 fouls
Image Image Leonidas I of Sparta (Warriors of Reknown) 87 blocks
Image Image Kublai Khan (Warriors of Reknown) 11 completions
Image Image Shoe Me The Way (Malapropisms Relieved) 8/60 cas / block
Image Image Kate, Return of the Klaw (Turbo Wolves) 9/1 pass / cp
Image Image Kate, Return of the Klaw (Turbo Wolves) 37 SPP
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