“FUMBBL SMACK XXXVI Round 2 Match
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This match report may contain language that you find distasteful.

If you are easily offended, sensitive, have no sense of humour, or have had something tragic happen to yourself or a loved one then look away now in case you have a reaction to something in the report.

The following terms may or may not be used in the following match report:

Assault
Bad coaching
Bad luck
Bash
Block
Bloody
Crap
Crud
Death
Dice
Dice rape
Hit
Kill
Lucker
Lucky
Murder
Smash
Splatt
Unlucky
Useless
Whiner
Whining
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The Flayers were undermanned this match after a very unlucky first round match vs the Police Enforcers.

The handicaps were:

Virus
Morleys (on 3, 2 on very good players)
Duh Where Am I?
Buzzing
one other

A pretty good draw of handicaps. The Flayers started in offence and were able to get a quick three turn score against a weakened Falcons lineup (two great Blitzers suffering from Morley's) after forming a 3 man sidestepping cage on the sideline but had to use their apothecary on turn 1.

On the Falcons drive, they started by sending two players deep. They found themselves under extreme pressure when the Flayers badly hurt their best available player - Pendrakal Baelwing (AG5 Blodge Tackle Sidestep Leap).

Things got more hairy when the Falcons tried to blitz away a Flayer player with Blodge Tackle Sidestep Diving Tackle and wasted a reroll without buying the necessary Pow or Dodge/Pow. With no RR left, the Falcons precariously formed a cage, requiring a pass, catch and at least one dodge (maybe GFI too) to set it up.

The Flayers knocked out another Falcon to have a 11-9 advantage on the pitch. Ouch.

The Falcons injured one Flayer then set up an easy TD (2+ dodge, 2+ hand off, 2+ GFI, 2+ pass with Pass skill and a 2+ catch) to take the score to 1-1 with 3 turns for the Flayers to attempt the go ahead TD.

The Flayers did not get far on their first turn, getting a few players one or two squares past the line of scrimmage. The Falcons promptly pushed them all back across the line.

The Flayers advanced the ball deep, only to have it knocked free (2 dice blitz) and it bounced around several players in tackle zones. The Falcons had no RR left for the turn and tried a difficult pickup and instead sent the ball onto the other side of melee where it was free of Falcons' tackle zones! Ooops.

It looked like an easy Flayers TD. It got harder when their 2 dice block to knock a player down and create an easy path for their scorer netted just Skull/Pows. The Flayers had to leap a player and then make 2 GFI.

No problems. Now an easy TD to come for the Flayers, just a 2+ pick up, 2+ dodge and then 2x 2+ GFI to get a 2+ pass (with Pass reroll) and a 2+ catch to take the lead. Just 5 rolls of 2+...

The Flayers pick up the ball, then fail the dodge, using a team reroll and they decide to throw a 3+ pass instead. Snakes! 3 ones in four rolls. Extremely unlucky for Texan.

The Falcons responded by causing a -1 Str injury on a blitzer with a straigh up block (no damange mods), then a 2+ dodge to blitz the Flayers' thrower away from the ball. Then a 2+ dodge, 2+ pick up, 2+ GFI, 2+ throw and 2+ catch to score a TD. THAT'S how you roll 2+s, Texan!!! Heh, totally a lucky turn around there.

In the second half, the Flayers were kicking with 9 players. A pitch invasion followed, stunning four Flayers and three Falcons. The Falcons had an average turn of blocks and with no reroll, only had one player deep with 3 players in defence to protect the ball.

The Flayers applied some pressure and the Falcons ended up passing to a Str4 Blodger near the endzone.

The Flayers leaped and dodged their way to setting up a 2 dice bllitz on the blodger and got a pow, knocking the ball lose. The Flayers thrower tried to dodge his way to the ball but failed, burning a team RR in the process (3+ required). The Falcons recovered the ball and scored to take a 3-1 lead.

On the next Flayers drive, they blitzed their way through one sideline and set up a mini-cage. A Falcons Blitzer was killed and revived by the apothecary causing anxiety for head coach Malthor (the same anxiety felt by Texan since turn 1 LOL). The Falcons wing defence was not holding up as well as it used to since they sacked two diving tackle players...

The Falcons set up an out of bounds play on the Flayers DP but chose not to do it at the last minute and the Flayers scored an easy TD.

The Flayers kicked then with 9 players, executed a Perfect Defence to put the Falcons off guard. The Falcons did not get very far and decided to cage near the line of scrimmage. Then came a very funny and both lucky and lucky play. The Falcons catch was dropped (a 1) then it scattered luckily onto a cage corner who had not moved yet. He made the 3+ catch of the bouncing ball then handed the ball back to the original intended recipient!

The Flayers applied pressure to the 3 receivers the Falcons had sent deep. The Falcons tried to blitz one defender away but failed so went for a pass to the player in the tackle zone and the rookie Lineman made his 3+ catch and 2+ dodge to take the score 4-2 with 3 turns for the Flayers to score two to draw.

The Flayers lined up in offence with 9 and with Morley's taking effect, one side of the Falcons looked weak with not much tackle and the Flayers again blitzed through and set up an easy TD.

One turn left for each team. A Pitch Invasion stuns four Flayers!

The Falcons blitz the Str4 Buzzing Tackle Flayer and cause a niggling injury (ouch). The Flayers respond with a turn 16 badly hurt and it is game over.
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A very fun match against a very fun coach. A fair few specs to keep us entertained with their noise too.

Some very effective handicaps made it very hard for the Falcons to stop a score, even against 9 players. It was only the 3 ones in 4 rolls that gave the Falcons the go ahead instead of possibly going into the second half one TD down.

A nasty set of injuries for Texan's team (including the two he copped in the previous match). Diaster also for the Falcons whose Witch Elf got to 76 spp and niggled. Crappio. A very costly tournament (and worse to come next game too heh).

Texan played a very good game apart from that one drive where I got the easy two dice blitz on his ball carrier. I should have not tried a difficult ball pick up with no team RR left for the turn as it was pretty safe in there with so many tackle zones on the ball (and on opposing players) but a gambler by heart, I jumped on it and set up what looked to be a very easy TD only to have nuffle cheat Texan out of the go ahead score.

Anyways, I wish Texan and his team a great recovery so that I can play them once more.

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