“Good evening, sports fans of all ages!

Tonight saw the Tasmanian Rangers play their round 5 match, going up against Nekrosis in a hard hitting well-played match.

While the scoreline ended at one apiece, both sides had lasting memories of this match bashed into them, with John Bowen of the Tasmanian Rangers falling to a painful punch by bubonic, contracting an infection around the wound which inflamed his brain and required he be stabbed in the head with a silver stake by the apothecary lest he infect the entire team, and Contagious Equine Metritis of Nekrosis taking a back injury that will plague him for matches to come when Jim Bacon decided to try to prevent Nekkrosis' second half touchdown.

John Bowen will be sorely missed by the Tasmanian Rangers, but will be replaced by Marcos Ambrose, the newly accepted thrower into the Tasmanian Ranger's Lineup.

The Tasmanian Rangers are scheduled to play the Killilith Dragons next round, a rematch from season XV that promises to be interesting. Nekrosis goes on this season to play the Lothern Pro Vixens, the other Pro Elf team in the Commissioner Twahn Memorial Regional League XVI. Will the draw against the elves today carry over to the next match for Nekrosis? only time will tell.

Thwahnlow votes:

3 - Bubonic: the most effective remover of players from the game this match.

2 - Pazuzu: For preventing key players from making their presence felt with his tentacles.

1 - Paramyxo: for scoring in the dying seconds of the second half to equalise.”