“"No'sse szallenszed usss! We will bea'dm do in sze g'ound!" Wassshsz and gossz, now the official spokesman of the team, was fully convinced of that. It had worked last time as well, so there was a chance it would work again. Well - if, if the challanging team wouldn't have been Interesting Times, the team with the highest Cas rating in the league. Wassshsz and gossz was and still is unaware of that though, not having the slightest idea what statistics are or how to read/interpret them.
And then the game began - Massstey II chickend out from playing by complaining about an old injury, wailing somewhere in the back of the cabin all the time. Johnson'sss knocked him over finally shutting him up, and indeed providing the real reason for Massstey II to stay off the pitch.
The Sauri went out on the pitch and met the Norse team holding hands and looking alltogether happy. Ssskin Sszo Soft even had brought a crown made of Flowers! The norse began by kicking off and One Horny Bugger was more than willing to share the general cuddly atmosphere.
Schwarzkopf Osiss a hughe fan of One Horny Bugger copied his behaviour right away, Three Broken Teeth didn't really enjoy being hugged though and just escaped to some other plane of existence. Johnsonn'sss still annoyed about the tantrum Massstey II had thrown in the cabin just ran succesfully past one of the norse blitzers, to welcome Two Novelty Candle to the game. Two Novelty Candle apparently was afraid of the furiously appoaching sauri and dodged out of the embrace. A bad thing todo. Nothing makes the Shampoo Slurperssz sauri more angry than people that refuse to be hugged. Not only the Sauri though - Finesse promptly kicked One Horny Bugger without much of a visible effect though.
One Horny Bugger did seem to have suffered some kind of short amnesia though as he tumbled over Ausssie II in the next move landing on the floor and injuring Ausssie II slightly. Fresh Soy, following Finessse's example this time stunning One Horny Bugger properly. Finessse refuses to explain where exactly he kicked the Minotaur though.
Some Norse scored a touchdown or two or three, none of the sauri can't remember, and most of the Skink are to affraid of Johnson'sss temper to talk about the match much. Sssalon Selectivess mentioned throwing one of his famous yet inaccurate passes that accidently ended up next to the Norse thrower. Assumingly that helped them to score. None of the Slurpersssz cared though, being busy trying to catch and cuddle some of the cute yet unwilling Norse.
Suddenly Sssskin Szo Soft tumbled, being tripped over by a cow - or whatever that was - and not being able to play on, because his crown of flowers was damaged. As the apo didn't manage to repair the crown Ssskin Szo Soft left the pitch and spent the rest of the match trying to do that on its own - not really easy if your agility is rated with a 1.
On the end of the first half the Norse somehow had managed to resist the sympathetic cuddling attempts of the Slurperssz so violently that most of the sauri and a good deal of the Skinks were not able to play all. Both Sssalon Selectivess and Finessse were still on the pitch though - and, for the first time ever since learning how to throw these Long Bombs Sssalon Selectivess actually threw the ball exactly to Finessse that managed to catch it easily!
In the second half then the skinks had enough of the Norse, which became quite nasty, and only a pair of Sauri made their way out on the pitch. And finally the norse where in a real cuddly mood too, surrounding the two Sauri and dancing a bit with them. Everybody was happy and merry and had fun and danced around - so wildly that one after the other Sauri tripped over and fell, with tears of joy in its eyes. How wonderful the world was - and how great to be there on the field looking into the sky and thinking about anything and nothing and letting the time fly by. Some Norse flew by and scored some touchdowns, but what are touchdowns if you can cuddle. Saddly the Referee ended the game much to early and the Saurus are already on the lookout for the next lovely game. ”
#5 Four Happy Casualty – Smashed Knee (NI) #12 Three Broken Teeth – Dead (RIP) #16 Seven Last Player – Smashed Knee (NI)
“*Translated from Norse by One Horny Bugger, who studies languages in his spare time - this is why he doesn't take part in most training sessions, and thus makes mistakes from time to time.*
Hello and welcome to the game, sports fans! Today we see exactly how cold-blooded these Shampoo Slur... - does this say what I think it does? Damn... - how cold-blooded this lizardman team really is! From the dense jungle of Lustria they come, to stand against the icy rage of Interesting Times!
Interesting Times, not finding any opponents to be challenged immediately, finally issued a lazy challenge to the Shampoo Guzzlers - sorry, Slurpers - which the Slurpers happily accepted, as they are currently on a suicide mission. So the game starts, and all the Interesting Times players but for Two Killing Fists show up. Thought the Norse numerical advantage may weigh, they may be in for a surprise.
One Horny Bugger starts the match off, hitting the Slurpers Kroxigor but only stunning him, then left and right go the blocks and miraculously not a single Slurper leaves the field! Incredible! And what's this? Three Broken Teeth is carried off the field on a brancard, and by the look of the medics he is quite... yes, he's quite dead! Hah! Imagine that...
Well, this game is going a bit fast for me... Ouch... *wince* Ugh, was that bone I heard cracking? Yugh...
Well, Four Novelty Candle appears to have run the ball in for a touch-down, and the fray has started again... Oh my word, look at that skink THROW! That is an incredible arm... Pity it lands next to the Interesting Times thrower.
Ow! There goes One Running Sentry! I can hear his agonising screams even up here... But the apoth lends a hand, and all seems better.
A horrible melee... And Two Novelty Candle has rammed the ball onto One Horny Bugger's left horn and is now prodding him towards the end-zone! But no, the minotaur gets surrounded! He blitzes, he gets free, his opponent goes down, and there he runs! YES! He scores! A marvellous display by this most versatile of minotaur blitzers!
The second half starts, and only five players remain for the Slurpers, the Kroxigor havng long since fallen to One Horny Buggers continuous sexual harassment... I mean, blocking, sorry, I was thinking of my current court case, Freudian slip, you know how it goes. What do you mean "Who the hell is Freud?" Just shut up and let me do the commenting, please!
Well, the Slurpers aren't having much luck picking up the ball, as their lone skink dropped it, but look! Interesting Times' star blitzer, Four Happy Casualty, is off the pitch and appears to have a rather severe injury! The medics are shaking their heads over it... Let's hope this does not end his carreer prematurely...
One Running Sentry is doing incredible stuff here, running up the field at great speed, snatching the ball from the grasp of a poor skink and dodging clear... That's the second time this half, and we're only halfway through it!
Now this is... interesting, certainly... The Slurpers are left with two Sauri players... Make that one... Ugh, the last of the Sauri gets fouled off the pitch... Horrible display... Fortunately, two other Sauri wake up and can now take place again on the field... Okay, just one... And that last one doesn't want to get up any more...
Well, tat appears to be it... One Running Sentry sprints in to make it six to zero, and the final whistle blows! I must say that the Slurpers Sauri were exceptionally brave there! Even though they were horribly outnumbered they just kept ramming into the Interesting Times offence, and sometimes even succeeded in bringing their opponents down against great odds! A heart-felt applause for this great display of sportsmanship!
*Here ends the translation*
Four Happy Casualty commenting on his injury: "Yøu knøw, if I put my hånd like this, ånd then råm this knife up yøur gut, I hårdly feel it åt åll." The interviewer who asked the question died in the execution of his duty.”
Click on the charts to toggle relative statistics.
And then the game began - Massstey II chickend out from playing by complaining about an old injury, wailing somewhere in the back of the cabin all the time. Johnson'sss knocked him over finally shutting him up, and indeed providing the real reason for Massstey II to stay off the pitch.
The Sauri went out on the pitch and met the Norse team holding hands and looking alltogether happy. Ssskin Sszo Soft even had brought a crown made of Flowers! The norse began by kicking off and One Horny Bugger was more than willing to share the general cuddly atmosphere.
Schwarzkopf Osiss a hughe fan of One Horny Bugger copied his behaviour right away, Three Broken Teeth didn't really enjoy being hugged though and just escaped to some other plane of existence. Johnsonn'sss still annoyed about the tantrum Massstey II had thrown in the cabin just ran succesfully past one of the norse blitzers, to welcome Two Novelty Candle to the game. Two Novelty Candle apparently was afraid of the furiously appoaching sauri and dodged out of the embrace. A bad thing todo. Nothing makes the Shampoo Slurperssz sauri more angry than people that refuse to be hugged. Not only the Sauri though - Finesse promptly kicked One Horny Bugger without much of a visible effect though.
One Horny Bugger did seem to have suffered some kind of short amnesia though as he tumbled over Ausssie II in the next move landing on the floor and injuring Ausssie II slightly. Fresh Soy, following Finessse's example this time stunning One Horny Bugger properly. Finessse refuses to explain where exactly he kicked the Minotaur though.
Some Norse scored a touchdown or two or three, none of the sauri can't remember, and most of the Skink are to affraid of Johnson'sss temper to talk about the match much. Sssalon Selectivess mentioned throwing one of his famous yet inaccurate passes that accidently ended up next to the Norse thrower. Assumingly that helped them to score. None of the Slurpersssz cared though, being busy trying to catch and cuddle some of the cute yet unwilling Norse.
Suddenly Sssskin Szo Soft tumbled, being tripped over by a cow - or whatever that was - and not being able to play on, because his crown of flowers was damaged. As the apo didn't manage to repair the crown Ssskin Szo Soft left the pitch and spent the rest of the match trying to do that on its own - not really easy if your agility is rated with a 1.
On the end of the first half the Norse somehow had managed to resist the sympathetic cuddling attempts of the Slurperssz so violently that most of the sauri and a good deal of the Skinks were not able to play all. Both Sssalon Selectivess and Finessse were still on the pitch though - and, for the first time ever since learning how to throw these Long Bombs Sssalon Selectivess actually threw the ball exactly to Finessse that managed to catch it easily!
In the second half then the skinks had enough of the Norse, which became quite nasty, and only a pair of Sauri made their way out on the pitch. And finally the norse where in a real cuddly mood too, surrounding the two Sauri and dancing a bit with them. Everybody was happy and merry and had fun and danced around - so wildly that one after the other Sauri tripped over and fell, with tears of joy in its eyes. How wonderful the world was - and how great to be there on the field looking into the sky and thinking about anything and nothing and letting the time fly by. Some Norse flew by and scored some touchdowns, but what are touchdowns if you can cuddle. Saddly the Referee ended the game much to early and the Saurus are already on the lookout for the next lovely game.
”