“Coulda Been A Contenda's first ELF match. My opponent got off on the wrong foot when "Simpleton" Sidorenko used his right foot to crush the spirit of Leo. With the numbers even, the match was joined in earnest. Unfortunately, Coulda shoulda done more on their defense. They had a couple of chances both early in the first half and late in the second to bust open the sloppy cage, but fell short due to lack of heart.

The game almost ended in a win with "Lummox" Lewis waving frantically in the endzone for a long bomb. Unfortunately, as is the pattern with this team, the rookie thrower fumbled his first throw, and a draw was recorded in the books.

ELF scoring: 10 (match) +5 (draw) +4 (tds for) -4 (tds against) +4 (casualties) = 19 pts”