“Brilliant match!

Before the match there was bit of a fight over who got the last of the Bloodweiser. Heads did roll, but only of innocent bystanders. Iop and Uizz however couldn't seem to get over the incident and therefore weren't on speaking terms when the game came around. (Read: Handicap was I Am the Greatest).

With only one mino taking to the field and a severely depleted squad meaning both "Slice" and "Mincer" had to take the field, it looked like it could be tough for the Pasties. Fortunately the saws and Iop worked their magic and despite the vicious Daft they started to clear the pitch and turn it a nice shade of red (or crimson, depending on your artistic interpretation). Yot running in the touchdown on the final turn.

With the ref alert enough to spot the saws but unable to see the pump wagon (cleverly disguised as a novelty ice cream cart) the Pasties looked a little depleted for the second half. Things didn't start off too well with Bogeys trolls taking their toll filling up the KO box. Iop did his thing though and after some skulls for the Bogeys he managed to get his grubby claws on Dozy, freeing both the ball and also Dozy from any obligations he felt to carrying on living. A scramble for the ball ensued which ended up with Veril grabbing the ball and making a run for it.

After inevitably being taken down though the ball was loose. The Pasties swarmed round and thought they'd done enough to secure the victory. Unfortunately Louder had other ideas. Dodging in to pick up and making a sprint for the line he equalised and thus thwarted the Pasties valiant defence.

Excellent game full of blood and drama. Looking forward to a rematch once both sides have got their breath back and if Azrahn isn't carted away for making "Vroooom!" noises all match. Laters sports fans.”