“Triumph!

Our Precious is Ours once again!

The match began as every match began since Our King, Ar-Pharazôn kathuphazgânun [that's the Ogre], gained block: He was fouled out during the first turn... What is more, Captain Samantha was able to outrun Our defence and scored the 1 - 0 for Our enemies, these so-called 'Corsairs of Umbar'. But such abhorrent deeds by these would-be usurpers of Our Precious didn't go unpunished!

Even before We had Our civilized tea-break We equalised to a well-earned 1 - 1.

Whilst We wisely used said tea-break to refreshen Ourselves, these corsairs, or should I say scruffy buccaneers, apparently did anything but recuperate. During the second half, they went down like flies, so Our graceful catcher, Bârî-Zimraphel managed to score Her second touchdown this match for a sound 2 - 1 win.

Well! Our Precious found Its way back to Its rightful owners, so Our gracious rulership over the lowly plebs may commence. Henceforth We will keep Our Precious safe and use It as We deem it best! Thence! populace, bow before Us, kneel down in front of Us and comply!

[Apostil: What? The Ring? Influencing our behaviour? - No way!]”