“THE STIFFERENMOAST ASTROGRANITE STADIUM (NUF) -- The mist settled heavily on the floor of the concrete stadium as over 60,000 fans packed into the stands at the Stifferenmoast Astrogranite Stadium to see what they were sure was going to be a hard-hitting affair between the upstart Blood Freaks and the very nasty, very dangerous Hometown Rat Boys. An undercurrent of revenge flowed through the Freaks locker room as they prepared for the match, looking to pay the Rat Boys back for their merciless dismantling of the Freaks' sister team, Gutter Cheese, which put the Cheese out of the Middle Mountain Bowl's semi-finals. They knew they were dramatically outclassed, and came out with a fire in their bellies and a lust for skaven blood. The Rat Boys, conversely, looked at this match as little more than a chance to avoid buying food for Biff (or worse, having to take him into a restuarant), and several of them were seen before the match attempting to see how many snotlings they could stick on Biff's claws before he would wake up, and were later seen playing 'Pin The Snotling On The Rat Ogre'. (9 was the snotling count, for the curious.)

As the match began, all seemed to be going to script. Biff mangled first the speedy Fraagh, then the somewhat less-than-durable Urrrguh!. The Rat Boys quickly knocked half of the Freaks off the pitch, even going so far as to pass up the opportunity to score in favor of flipping the ball carelessly between Gutter Runners. All the Blood Freaks could do was try not to die. Eventually, though, the Boys tired of toying with what Gary referred to as 'those cute little Chaos kids' (an utterance he later came to regret), and trotted downfield to an easy score, all the while Biff tried in vain to snag Aahrgh with his claws.

As the Rat Boys went back to the sideline after their first score, they laughed and told some jokes:
Tommy: What do you call a Beastman whose horns get broken?
Bobby: What?
Tommy: A slow line rat. Ha ha ha!
Bobby: That was stupid.
Tommy: Screw you.
No one said they were funny jokes, but they told them all the same.

As the Blood Freaks took a moment to reflect on the massacre that had just occurred over the first half of the first half, they resolved to not be intimidated by the rats, and to work really hard to try to understand what the coach meant by 'first half of the first half.' Few could handle the second part of their resolved mission, but they all took the first to heart.

As play continued, the Freaks put their only advantage to use, their greater team strength, and began to beat on the Rat Boys without hesitation. Braaght, performing to the same high levels he always has, scooped up the ball and raced toward the line of scrimmage, only to trip up just as he got there. Mercifully, the ball continued forward and landed right in the hands of Raaargh, the star Chaos Warrior.

Biff immedidately charged after Grraaft, whom he took to be an easy mark. But Grraaft had been given a special, exceptionally dangerous mission: Lure Biff away from the other rats. It took extreme stupidity to accept this mission, and only Grraaft had what it took to pull it off. As play continued, Grraaft was soon joined by Yurooht, and together they took turns drawing Biff's attention away from the others.

Inspired by the miraculous flight of the ball into his hands, certain that Khorne had blessed him this day, Raaargh charged around the pile of rats and down the field toward a score. Along the way, he even found time to punch a rat or two. Once Raaargh's score was inevitable, some of the Freaks finally freed themselves up to deal with Biff. As the first couple of Freaks got there, Biff continued to try very hard to mangle Grraaft. However, as the rest made their way over to Biff, their plan became apparent, and Biff was in trouble. Biff tried to go after Grraaft again, but this time, with help from his friends, Grraaft's claw ripped a sizable hole in Biff's side, and Biff was done for the day.

A cheer rang out from the small-but-loyal legion of fans that had come to see the Freaks, as they understood immediately what this meant: their team had a real chance to pull off the upset of a lifetime! Just as Biff's body hit the pitch, Raaargh trotted across the goal line to end the half, and the Freaks' fans went bananas. The same cannot be said for the Rat Boys' fans, most of whom left at halftime. They had come to see Biff, and with Biff gone there was no longer any reason for them to stay.

The second half began with both teams' energy levels through the roof. The Rat Boys were now playing to survive in what they had expected to be a blowout. The Blood Freaks were confident their assault could not be contained, and they wanted to see rats maimed and mangled. The Blood Freaks were moving the ball effectively, but that was secondary in both teams' minds to the desire to cripple one another.

However, the fans quickly stopped cheering, as one ghastly injury after another induced vomitting on both sides of the stadium. These fans, who had come to see all the greusome fun of a Blood Bowl match, couldn't stomach the massive wave of violence they witnessed on the field, and frankly, neither could this reporter. The stands, the pressbox, the luxury suites, everything except the pitch itself was empty midway through the 2nd half. The referee reported afterward that the Blood Freaks had indeed scored and won the match 2-1, though it has been reported by one source that the referee had also left early and merely been offered more money by the Blood Freaks.

That said, all we know for sure is that Gary paid for his earlier comment, as he was seen walking to the team bus on crutches, and Rhootuh, the Blood Freaks' worst lineman, was taken home in a body bag. Raaargh said after the match "Khorne has blessed us this day with the blood of the Hometown Rat Boys, and all praise is due to him. I ROCKED THEIR ASSES! THEY BOWED TO ME! I BREAK THEM! HURT! RRRAAAAAAAARRRGH!" The syllables of his scream are an approximation, as this reporter was, at that moment, in a full sprint away from the blood-lusting Chaos Warrior.”