“A man of few words, Innaface's Head Coach Ziggy left the FUMBBL news crew with the simple statement: "Bugger". Simple words that sum up what was a harsh first game for the dwarves. A point in the bag but two key players in boxes.

The news crew faired less well against Infected Poledancers star player Cindy, who managed to eat two of them and maim a third before they could escape. Those who survived the encounter managed to glean that the team were initially disappointed that they were unable to capitalise on the advantage of numbers provided by the early onslaught, but the killing had cheered them up a bit.

In the voice of a thousand chattering insects, Faith, an infected Champion of Demon God Nurgle added: "Jumpers for goal posts, isn't it? hmm? Marvelous"
”