“Kondor was uncharacteristically grumpy at the end of this match. Perhaps it was the pre-game hype. Perhaps it was the fact that field was gooey. More than likely it was nothing more than losing 2-0 in a game he wanted the guard to win. Damn, he would have to be a drill instructor during practice this week.
At mid-field, he met Dr. Babau. They had spoken a few times before and watched one another's teams in action. His "medical" squad had done some impressive work. That Experiment BHZ-001 was mean enough to make smallpox look like the excuse you use to get out of work for a day, but boy did it make a mess when you kicked it in the sack. At least, I think that's where the SWAT Guy kicked him. It certainly crumpled like a sack of wet crap. I guess it did not hurt that the entire team held the creature down while SWAT got a good running start. I swear someone in the crowd caught a testicle as a souvenir. And I'm sure I heard Syphillis chuckle at the sight.
Ahh, the memory brought a momentary twinkle to Kondor's eye, and he enthusiastically shook Dr. Babau's hand. "Congratulations, but don't expect the next match to go so easily." he stated. Indeed, the Guard would be running until the puked each day for a week. Actually, why wait. Time to get those scum bags working. None of them are hurt. So with a nod, Kondor stepped past the sludge at center field and returned to the locker room.
As he reached the locker room, he encountered SEAL. Bystanders could never guess which individual was more stone faced, but before Kondor could bark, Seal shouted. "Sir, I request permission to kick any downed player in the nuts when ever the opportunity presents itself, Sir."
Kondor smiled. He had found a new dirty player. "Permission granted soldier. but to become the best nut cracker in the league you've got to get some work. There is an orc practice squad on the practice field. Don't come back without at least a dozen set of orc nuts for orcy mountain oysters tonight." The entire team needs to get more gritty for the next games, and that would start with dinner.
"Sir, Yes Sir!" was the response and Seal was off on a dead sprint. The door of the locker room had not even closed when a soprano screech of "medic" came from the practice field in a queer orcish voice.
Now Kondor smiled a moment and began shouting. "Alright you sorry excuses for blood bowlers, get yer pansy assses down to the practice field and start running until I tell you to stop. I don't care if you are naked get yer asses moving before I put my boot so far up it you'll........"
It was going to be a long night.
----------------------------
Congrats on the win Babau. You earned it. I look forward to the rematch.”
“Seeing that the opponent team's coach was about to cross the pitch in order to shake hands with him Dr. Babau and his medical staff went out too, and so they met in the middle of the field.
That has been an extremely interesting test of the reaction of the specimens of the BHZ project to a stressful situation.
The case in object, the sudden deprivation of the presence of the main experiment (a failed regeneration process took place, probably due to some reactive matter on the boot of that godsforsaken #@$£%6! fouling elf... erm...) was followed by the subsequent incapacitation of the Thetanus-infected specimen after a particularly vicious block.
The Experiment BHZ-001 is luckily not heavily damaged and will be reconstructed in time for the next match.
Anyway, the team demonstrated a very good coordination capability, capitalizing in self-assistance and reciprocal coverage.
In simpler words, we had more rerolls than them...
Notice how the Pneumonia-infected specimen seems to have developed some kind of leadership capability and has been able to mantain team unity despite te loss of the main player.
The medical staff wishes hereby to congratulate coach Kondor for a very well played match. The Project won this one thanks to a percentage of luck that we will not underestimate.
We look forward to our next match. We will try to test some of our newly developed theories on biological warfare applied to Blood Bowl.
Regards.
_______________________________________
After Match Notice: As it seems a Dark Elf fan in the crowd came somehow into possession of a piece of the experiment (a testicle, testimonials reports) and decided to keep it as a souvenir.
We'd like to take this occasion to remind everyone that detaining pieces of specimens infected with Nurgle's rot can be EXTREMELY hazardous to one's health.
On the bright side, the Dark Elf fan has decided to join our team as our fist rotter.
Regards again.”
Click on the charts to toggle relative statistics.
At mid-field, he met Dr. Babau. They had spoken a few times before and watched one another's teams in action. His "medical" squad had done some impressive work. That Experiment BHZ-001 was mean enough to make smallpox look like the excuse you use to get out of work for a day, but boy did it make a mess when you kicked it in the sack. At least, I think that's where the SWAT Guy kicked him. It certainly crumpled like a sack of wet crap. I guess it did not hurt that the entire team held the creature down while SWAT got a good running start. I swear someone in the crowd caught a testicle as a souvenir. And I'm sure I heard Syphillis chuckle at the sight.
Ahh, the memory brought a momentary twinkle to Kondor's eye, and he enthusiastically shook Dr. Babau's hand. "Congratulations, but don't expect the next match to go so easily." he stated. Indeed, the Guard would be running until the puked each day for a week. Actually, why wait. Time to get those scum bags working. None of them are hurt. So with a nod, Kondor stepped past the sludge at center field and returned to the locker room.
As he reached the locker room, he encountered SEAL. Bystanders could never guess which individual was more stone faced, but before Kondor could bark, Seal shouted. "Sir, I request permission to kick any downed player in the nuts when ever the opportunity presents itself, Sir."
Kondor smiled. He had found a new dirty player. "Permission granted soldier. but to become the best nut cracker in the league you've got to get some work. There is an orc practice squad on the practice field. Don't come back without at least a dozen set of orc nuts for orcy mountain oysters tonight." The entire team needs to get more gritty for the next games, and that would start with dinner.
"Sir, Yes Sir!" was the response and Seal was off on a dead sprint. The door of the locker room had not even closed when a soprano screech of "medic" came from the practice field in a queer orcish voice.
Now Kondor smiled a moment and began shouting. "Alright you sorry excuses for blood bowlers, get yer pansy assses down to the practice field and start running until I tell you to stop. I don't care if you are naked get yer asses moving before I put my boot so far up it you'll........"
It was going to be a long night.
----------------------------
Congrats on the win Babau. You earned it. I look forward to the rematch.”