“Playing Orcs, the last thing you want to do is rely entirely on your two stupid little goblins. But when all other players, bar one Black Orc, are either prone or knocked out and your Troll sits on the bench with a niggling injury, you do what you can with what you have.

My first TD came at the end of the first half. Snotty had some serious difficulties dodging and holding on to the ball. He can do both, not just at the same time. Eventually though, after the sole dwarven defender had stumbled and hurt himself, he managed to score the first goal.

The second TD was scored with only seven of my players remaining. I had to give the ball to the one player on my team who could stand a chance at outrunning the dwarven defense - Smitty the goblin. My thrower made sure he'd tied his shoelaces, gave him a pat on the back and sent him out to run with the wolves. By Gork, that boy sure can run! The dwarves saw nothing but a tiny dust cloud disappearing downfield.”