“Coach JKB fills in for the Smash Lad on Postgame Notes:

Our esteemed Captain Larry Lacoste isn't available to report on the details after this afternoon's game, after a 'sniper' in the stands nearly blinded his left eye with a perfectly-targetted rock. We're fitting him for an eye-patch as I write this and he should be fine, though I can't promise the same for any Elves who meet him in the street afterwards...

The home crowd was clearly displeased after last week's shutout against the dwarves. They, perhaps moreso than their team, came to the stadium with a belly-full of fire (-water?) and a temper to match - as soon as the opening lineups took the field, the rabid Fey Folk overpowered stadium security and gangle-tackled eight players at random before grabbing some soddy souvenirs and returning to their seats. The ruckus greatly favored our possession, as it opened up the right side of their defense for our play to get started. Carl proved his ferocity once again with a terrible overhand blow that tore through a poor Elf's arm - I expect Mr. Rossinger will need an extra week to let that heal up.

The Felons set up a Saurian cage around the ballcarrier in enemy territory, making our eventual score a mere formality. But Lady Luck still had more to lay on our plate, as our brutal blows yielded a trio of knockouts and an emergency visit from the Doctor (who used his entire field kit to keep Wardancer Ziggy Zigginesterian on the gridiron).

With little time and manpower left for execution, the Elves managed nothing with the rest of the half.

We enjoyed a "power play" into the second half - a single-man advantage after an angry fan plunked the Smash Lad as mentioned earlier. The Elves started to take more risks to get their offense in a rhythm, but an incomplete pass turned into a loose-ball recovery by Gibroni (Don of the Skink family), and while our attempted "double reverse" failed, it allowed us to keep the ball surrounded with scales, and eventually we forced a turnover and got the ball to The Quiet Kid heading alone to the end zone! One problem....Kid forgot to tie his shoelaces. Trip, fall, drop the ball - and the Elves are poised to tie the game with the clock nearing Zero!!

At this point, it seems obvious that stress rushed their decision-making. Jereminium ran to the ball, and heaved an accurate pass downfield to Wardancer Zaggy, who leaped elegantly for the ball - and landed flat on his kiester, as he failed to account for the weight of the two skinks tugging at his trousers!

The Crowd snatched the ball off the sideline, and heaved it back into play, bitterly disregarding their inept players and delivering the ball directly in the path of Gibroni. Scoop, scamper, score!

An incredible game for the travelling Felons, who managed a casualty (by Carl, of course), a pair of TDs, 41 yards of rushing, an even 35 blocks, and even snagged a couple new season ticket-holders after the match.

Freshwater Transactions
"Lightning" Angelo Rossi hired - another bruising Saurus who fills out our stone-handed frontcourt.

Freshwater Training
Carnivorous Carl has learned how to fend off adjacent foes in order to assist teammates in their blocking efforts - which should serve us very well against other teams that play with strength up front.

Gibroni took a rare lesson in blocking, making him a safer, more respectable fighting force (in conjunction with his fellow Skinks, of course).

”