“When in doubt, play vs ogres! Always exciting and unpredictable to the end...unless it's AI...then we know we're getting squished!

We who are Hellbound meet the giants of the world head on! Viking helmets vs boulder fists! And in the end, the power of the wheel prevailed! Lester and Biondi score with the world's attention on them...now upgrade, reaper of heads, to Pro! Do thy dirty work without flaw!

DeMaio "A nice win vs the bashiest race on this mudball planet. And a hearty hello to all our new fans! You give us life! We DIE for you!!"”