“My name is Howard Handpuppy, and I would like to welcome you to this first round match of the rookie cup. Todays teams are the chaos Zuvassin Chosens led by coach skejwen and the skaven team, aptly named Arrowfooder, coached by Jemy.

It is a bright and sunny day, the stands are packed with 55000 screaming lunatics, also sometimes refered to as fans...

I had a chance to speak to coach Jemy before the game, and asked her what her plan was for the game today.

-Well, my guys are fast, and they get hurt. Alot. So the plan is, we will try to get to score as much as possible before our team is all dead.

It seemed to this reported, Coach Jemy had done the preparations for this strategy, I could see eleven coffins all lined up in the Arrowfodder dugout.


Ah, I can see now that the teams are lining up for the kickoff. Zuvassin Chosens will be attacking first. The skaven have set up in the middle, not guarding the flanks, and the chaos team have set up in a more classic setup cowering the whole line of scrimmage.

Arrowfodder only have three linerats on the line of scrimmage facing two beastmen, two chaos warriors and one troll.
This will be fun!!!

The kick was bad and the ball is given to beastman Zussvah.
Beastman Zuhg starts the drive by knocking out linerat Eek "Breakable" Linko with a nasty uppercut.
Mikey "Carrots" Omalley is stunned after a headbutt from Chaos warrior Zassuv Undoer.
The line of scrimmage is freed from skaven. Lets see what Zuvassin Chosens will do now. They have formed a protective pocket around Zussvah at the line of scrimmage and are advancing on both flanks, its looks like they are trying to box the skaven in.

Arrowfodder is reacting now, linerat Tom "Jailbreak" Mallone distracts beastman Zahurs and LOOK AT THIS, stormvermin Ramy "Yo Adrian" Blow storms out from the middle and knocks Zahur out with a dropkick to the jaw. Nice play. Such grace.

The rest of the skaven the back away from their opponents, except for Mikey Omally who is still stunned.

Zuvassin Chosens are advancing up the middle, protecting the ballcarrier Zussvah. Chaos warrior Zassuv Undoer and beastman Begurg are getting ready to put the hurt on gutterrunner Coffin "Touchdown" Grey.
Bad idea, it appears. Just as Begurg get in range, Coffin kicks him. OH MY that one hit him right in the ding dongs!

Stormvermin Getis "Enforcer" Somme knocks down Zussvah, and the ball pops out of his hands. It lying in the middle of a large scrum that has formed around the line of scrimmage. Its hard to see exactly what is happening. Alot of block are thrown, lets see who emerges with the ball.

Beastman Ghurzg has picked up the ball, but still has alot of skaven around him. Linerat Snuffles "Pretty Boy" Bay, knocks Ghurzg and the ball bounces wildly. It ends up behind the chaos team. Coffin "Touchdown" Grey dashes around the ruckus and get to the ball. Amasing! He is completly useless at picking up the ball. I though ballhandling was what gutterrunners does best?

The scrum in the middle continues as chaos warrior Ashka Liar and beastman Gorzov both take their turns trying to knock down Coffin Grey, but he stays on his feet, dangerously close to the ball.

Zassuv Undoer fails a block and goes down. Perhaps surprised by the willingness of the skaven, the chaos now look abit disorganised as the skaven manage to knock down quite afew of them. Linerat Luke "Summertime" Jux and thrower Kirk "Yoda" Slackmeister assists Coffin Grey. This time he manages to get his hands on the ball and makes a break for the chaos endzone.

Chaos Warrior Ashka Liar plants a terrific, brutal roundhouse kick in the face of linerat Marvin "Salad O´Plenty". Ok, goodnight nurse, he is out! Not only that, he is seriously hurt. He will miss the next game and have a niggling injury the rest of his career. Nice block Ashka! Thats the spirit!

The chaos are however unable to do any damage to the skaven protecting the ball, gutterrunners Coffin Grey and Snipes Hamster Hamster runs towards the endzone unthreathened.

The scrum continues on the line, Beastman Zussvah gouges Mikey "Carrots" Omalley stomace, he is out for the game as well. Badly hurt the little, furry fellow...

Horrified by the carnage caused by the opponents, the gutterrunners decide to score, Snipes Hamster Hamster runs into the endzone and Coffin "Touchdown" Grey easily throws him the pass.

Zuvassin Chosens 0 - 1 Arrowfodder

The crowd goes wild!!!

Two turns remaining in the first half, the teams line up again. The skaven have line up in the middle again and the chaos cowers the entire field.

Another bad kick, the ball is given to beastman Ghurzg. Zuvassin Chosens are advancing up the left flank unopposed. What is this? On the other side of the field, chaos Troll Solog if facing down linerat Tom "Jailbreak" Mallone.

HOLY NUFFLE!!!
WHAT A BLOCK!

Tom goes down. Hard. He is out, out, out! Seriously hurt. He misses the next game and loses some strength as well. The chaos are kicking backsides and taking names today.

Snipes Hamster Hamster and Kirk "Yoda" Slackmeister gangs up on Ghurzg. He goes down, the ball ends up in the hands of Snipes Hamster Hamster.

Zuvassin Chosens are unable to get the ball from Snipes, he tries to pass Luke "Summertime " Jux but the pass goes wild.

End of the first half.

The score is still;

Zuvassin Chosens 0 - 1 Arrowfodder

Its Arrowfodders time to attack. The kickoff is good and lands way back, towards the skaven endzone. It will be a long drive facing them.

Getis "Enforcer" Somme sets the tone by knocking out beastman Ghurzg, no doubt in retaliation for the nice smacking his teammates have been getting so far in the game.

Snipes Hamster Hamster and Ramy "Yo Adrian" Blow opens up the rest of the right right flank by knocking down beastman Zussvah. Coffin Grey helps Kirk "Yoda" Slackmeister get his hands on the ball.

The chaos are counterattacking, however no serious injuries are caused and the skaven drive continues.

The Slackmeister rushes forward and passes the ball to Snipes HAmster Hamster with ease. Snipes takes it forward, dodging like a, skaven gutterrunner, past two chaos players. He makes it looks so easy. GO SNIPES!!!

He is within a yard of the endzone.

Eek "Breakable" Linko blocks beastman Zahur, they both go down, Eek knocked down, Zahur knocked out.

Beastman Zussvah is the only chaos player close enough to just reach Snipes outside the endzone. All Snipes has to do is an easy dodge into the endzone for the touchdown.

MuhHAHAHAHAHHAHAA!!!

Nuffle sure has humor, he fails the dodge and his dodgeskill does not save snipes. He goes down and knocks himself out in the bargain. What a useless little rat.

The chaosteam continues to knock the feeble skaven around. Zussvah picks up the ball without any problem and runs towards the line of scrimmage.

Coffin "Touchdown" Grey decides to even the odds. He dodges and weaves, runs up to Zussvah and elbows him in the eye. The ball pops loose and Coffin picks it up.

The rest of the skaven ties up as many of the chaos players as they can.

Beastman Zuvgor blitzes Coffin, knocks him down and get the ball. On the line of scrimmage, beastman Zuhg knocks out linerat Eek " Breakable" Linko.

Coffin looks completly furious, he gets up and blitzes the ballcarrier again. Zuvgor goes down, stunned and humiliated. That was a gutterrunner mate, not a black orc...

The ball is picked up by the suicidal Coffin who get one yard from the endzone again.

Zussvah blitzes Coffin right back, he is knocked down hand Zussvah gets the ball.

Solog the troll manages to knock out linerat Luke "Summertime" Jux.

Snuffles "Prettyboy" Bay rushes to help Coffin out. But it doesnt look like he needs much help. for the third time he blitzer a stronger opponent and manages to take him down. This time he get down to, but he is still in the game.

Zuvgor comes around and blitzes Luke "Summertime" Jux, he ets stunned. Gorzov is unable to pick up the ball. It goes over the sidelines and ends up in the middle of the field, omniously close to the skaven thrower Kirk "Yoda" Slackmeister...

Coffin sees the chance to score, he get up and dodges his way into the endzone, awaiting the pass from the Slackmeister.

The slackmeister, dodges away from his opponent, picks up the ball and rushes forward for the pass...

And fails, even with his passing skill.

Luckily for the skaven Zussvah also fumbles his attempt to pick up the ball.

Coffin makes one last try to score, but he fails his dodge and get knocked down.

And the lat thing that happens in the game is another failed attempt from Zussvah to pick up the ball.

The game is over.

Zuvassin Chosens 0 - 1 Arrowfodder

A great game with lots of twists and turns. Will be interesting to see if Arrowfodder will have a chance with two players down in the next.

I am Howard Handpuppy, saying, goodnight and good luck.

Thats it folks, you dont have to go home but you can´t stay here...”