“Despite the meager forces of the Phun With Phonetics team after a crippling affair of halfling on halfling violence earlier today (turns out the prize was a bucket of Captain Zander's Extra Greasy Chicken and the Authurians hadn't eaten since thier bout against ogres ) the Blodgerettes came away with only two scores.
That's right folks, these poor dames were so lost and confused in the first half it took a gentle push from Phonetic's own Lima Lad to get the girl into the end zone (and earning him a VIP for his gentlemanly efforts).
In a rare act of confusion November Nerd mistook a Blodgerette for a roast ham and bit her ankle so hard the apothecary had to be called in to remove the fork. Also carted off the pitch was Echo Enemy after being given a gang beating for asking his opponent if she could take his drinks order.
The second half proved to be faster paced when Hotel Hop made it way for the endzone before being throttled.
Unfortunately, the Blodgerettes had some trouble with picking up the ball because the ole Hop coated it with butter. It ultimately took a halfling cleaning off the ball, with his tongue, and handing it to the other team to get them back on track.
Heady with the prospect of a win over their emaciated enemies, and possibly the fumes of hairspray, the Blodgerettes again had difficulties crossing the pylon to tuchdown turf. Thankfully for them, after several turns of confusion, the Amazonians realised the white zone was for the offloading of footballs and not a tow away zone as they had been informed earlier.”