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* * * Did you know? The most touchdowns in a single match is 23.
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Match Result · League division
· Tournament game
Match recorded on 2010-12-12 22:18:37
20k
1/1/1
Player Performances
td
comp
cas
int
mvp
spp
turns
pass
rush
block
foul
TOTALS
1
1
1
-
1
11
-
5
24
45
3
#7 Mad Dog 20/20 Markiesje – Broken Ribs (MNG)
#8 Latvian Hound Kelcher – Broken Ribs (MNG)
#12 Scooby Doo Humphries – Dead (RIP)
#14 Wes Canis-Panther – Dead (RIP)
Player Performances
td
comp
cas
int
mvp
spp
turns
pass
rush
block
foul
TOTALS
2
1
6
-
1
24
-
3
51
36
11
#4 Steve "A Tisker a" Tasker – Broken Ribs (MNG)
#4 Steve "A Tisker a" Tasker – Smashed Hip (-MA)
"Coach Maybin!! Coach Maybin!! People are wondering about why the Billy Goats Gruff gave such brutal treatment to the new franchise, the San Dogo Chompers. Would you care to comment?"
Coach Maybin: Brutal? BRUTAL?!? Lemme tell you something here, fruitcake... this whole league is brutal. Walking UP here to talk to YOU schmucks is brutal. It's a brutal game. You don't like it?!... get a different beat for your fishwrap factory. Go cover the blooming flowers you like to cram in your butt....What're you talkin' about.... brutal?!?... baah
"But Coach, they were overmatched and you didn't have any of your players let up at any point. You even had the team circle jerk over the lone remaining opponent on the pitch while Christian Gaddis ran in the winning score... don't you think that's embarrassing?!"
Coach Maybin: Embarrassing that we only one by a single score after nearly clearing the pitch... yeah. Embarrassing that even with the ref sitting next to me for the last three quarters of the game that we couldn't clear the pitch... yeah. Embarrassing for your wife that you left the house looking like that and she has to sleep next to you for who knows how much longer?!?... yeah.
"Yes, Coach... about that, uh... ref... thing. You chose to blackmail the ref for this game even though you were clearly going to win...? Why?!"
Coach Maybin: WHAT?! What did the Chompers coach look like?! Was he a 6 month old baahaahaayby?! Was he?!? NO! We coulda lost that game as "easily" as we won it. You think just cuz we got some big dumb meat on our team that the other team is gonna lay down and let us win?!? What are you?... NEW?!?!!
NEWS FLASH for you, Pampers: We do what we have to in order to win. Nobody should fault us for leaning on (or up against) the ref for ANY of our games. If other teams did that to us, wouldn't any of you love to eat the carnage of goat meat that would ensue from such a situation?!?
...the reporters are silent...
Coach Maybin: WOULDN'T YOU??!??!! Hell, *I* would... you know YOU would... you'd eat every last morsel of dead goat and you'd ask for more... and don't stand there and lie to me and say you wouldn't!!! I can still smell Kawika on some of your jackets from you damn pigs wiping your greasy, drooling mouths with your arms after the Billy Goat picnic a couple seasons back!!!
"Take it easy"... BAH! "Go easy on 'em"... BAH! Nobody's goin' easy on us, I'll tell you that. But I'll make a deal with you twerps: First game we play where the other team DOESN'T try to block or foul or WIN... I will come over to your offices, cut my own nuts off and chew them up for you to feed to your pet weasels! I'M OUTTA HERE!!
Aaron Maybin tears off ramming into reporters intentionally as he leaves the room
Coach Maybin: GIT outta my way... AAaahaaAAhhm still the caAAahsualty leader in the NBFL!!! I will EAT YOUR FACE!!... I got a Jets game to gameplan for...”