“Gob Wars: A New Hope

A long time ago, in a fumbbl far, far away, there was a team called Hashut's Havoks. It reigned supreme, it stood unchallenged. It enslaved all in terrible, cruel tyranny and none could resist, for there was no hope.

But one small team dared defy them. The rebels of Lean, Mean, Fighting Green stood up and proclaimed that no! They would not be afraid of the Havoks! They would fight them unto their last breaths! And so the war started...

Coach-Emperor Xephaz in all his power decided to construct two Death Centaurs, and so he did. And they were awesome to behold, crushing all in their path. The front line of Fighting Green buckled under the pressure, but helpd in extremis. They stole the ball, and managed to throw it upfield, almost scoring. But alas, a last-minute counter-blow by Coach-Emperor Xephaz' forces denied the rebels, and they were undone, and the first of the Death Centaurs made a touch-down.

In the second half of the conflict the rebels sped for their goal in a swift guerilla strike, and they succesuflly made it there. Their lack of numbers, and the sad death of Santa made it necessary for the rebels to field two frail goblins, known in rebel circles as X-Wing Foulers.

In a surprising move, the rebels attained their goal, the much treasured end-zone, and as no Death Centaurs showed up, they proceeded to entrench, and to withhold from Coach-Emperor Xephaz their prize. But lo! There came the first Death Centaur... and he was vile to behold. he was tackled first by one of the rebels' Battle-Blitzers, but it seemed vain as the Death Centaur began to get up again. Then one of the X-Wings, nimble and swift, dodged through defenses and found a weak point in the Death Centaur... It left the field with smoke trailing from it.

There was cheering everywhere, but another Death Centaur approached! The Batlle-Blitzers went into formation and againthey brought the Death Centaur to its knees. Once more the daring X-Wing Fouler swept in. It found a reactor and blew it to smithereens... The Death centaur guttered, spluttered, but a back-up reactor fired into action, and the X-Wing was cruelly blasted into outer space. The Death Centaur then freed itself of the surrounding Battle-Blitzers and lumbered towards the prized ball.

But the Battle-Blitzers did not give up, and again the Death Centaur was brought down, and the second X-Wing, not heeding the fate of its predecessor, flew in and again tried to disable the Death Centaur. It flew straight into its maw, and the groaning was horrid... The Death Centaur stalled, broke down... The X-Wing was victorious! But it did not return. It had sacrificed itself for the greater good of the war.

With the Death Centaurs gone thanks to the brave actions of the X-Wing Foulers, the Battle-Blitzers protected the ball with all their power, and they managed to hold off Coach-Emperor Xephaz' forces. They entered the end-zone just as the war was halted, and they rejoiced, for they had not lost. Beyond all hope and expectation, they had not lost!”