“In this, the fourth match in the celebrated SWL, the Dandies face a famed and feared opponent in the form of coach Erikekers, and the world-renowned franchise, the Woodies. This form of the franchise has returned to its elfin roots; do they match the flair and grace of the Dandies?
The crowds thought not, flocking through the gates in a sea of yellow-and-brown.
On the pitch, the Dandies showed a measure of decorum, controlling their flamboyance in an attempt to thusly exert control over the flow of the game.
An unbiased observer would plausibly attribute a greater level of flair to the Woodies, who showed panache and boldness in defence, coming very close (numerous times) to stymieing the Dandies' plans.
Thankfully, the Dandies managed to stay true to their motto, and displayed their superior grace by not permanently crippling any of their opponents. Such honour and chivalry!

Doctor Waitrose is kind enough to offer his opinions of the game:
3 points - I am pleased to offer this award to the peerless Mandozer, who's blitzing flair more than once set loose the ball, and caused our defenders to scramble to recover!
2 points - Passive Miguel stunned us with his amazing speed early in the match; thereafter, his feet abandoned him, causing no end of merriment at the sight of him sprawled out on the pitch
1 point - This last must go to The Chad, who outlasted most of his teammates, and was tireless in his efforts to stem the tide.

Thanks for the game erik, was good fun, and I'm sure any rematch will be a very different story!”