“Dragging wounded and bleeding, the chariots of war storm the lands of elven pros for a game without armor on either side. Let flesh yield to rage!

Great is the power of Deepstone, who joins the bloody bandwagon of sinners and pops Dr. Badass in the nose! So fierce is the hit, that the bone fragments shoot into his brain and slay the manling! Enter our ranks already with a kill! Hail!

And to Trail of Flames who stops the mighty blitzer in his tracks, seizes the ball and scores! Upgrade to mighty blow and let all giants beware thy unstoppable punch!

The Dark Avenger is bless with unholy power of juggernaut! No beast can now stop thy charge and destruction!

But Scumm-o commits treason! Round one he takes a dive and enters the KO box. Then, in an hour of need for tackle, he hands DeMaio a worksheet.

DeMaio "What's this?"

Scumm-o "It's my annual leave request."

"Request denied! Get out there, without your tackle, we're going to lose!"

"umm yeah, I'm union. you can't deny my request."

DeMaio "but, but..."

Scumm-o "Talk to the costume, cuz the beard ain't listening. Hey, are those baked walnuts?!"

Scumm-o walks off and we lose 2-1

No tackle, no win. that simple. Scumm-o, you sucko!

but we still like-o.”