“Bulton Wanderers ended their first league season on high-note after a run of 4 defeats; though they are at risk of being accused of being flat-track bullies with both wins being against teams half-populated with midgets.

The strong hard-tackling backbone of the team lead by the devilishly mean Kevin Nolan managed not only to remove all the Snotlings from the field, but also saw off the huge hulking Ogre midefield of the visitinng Belgian team painfrites; though to be honest none of the Bulton team had any idea who painfrites were...Anderlecht, Standard, Genk, Brugge, Beveren, Chalroi, Germinal even Union SG all known teams...but painfrites???

The flair players benefited from the absence of Belgian numbers, and Jussi Jaaskelainen ran in a brace with his solo runs upfield. Gardner and Djorkaeff also bagged a TD apiece to complete a comprehensive if not unsurprising win.

Man of the match was for once correctly awarded to Kevin Nolan for his three casualties.”