“News Team Aim High

Sissons was conducting his traditional post-match scouring of the cupboards for snacks.

"Pastries! Why do we never have enough pastries? It's criminal, is what it is. In fact, this just in: not getting me enough pastries is a crime now" he burbled, trying to reach the top cupboard in the hope that it wouldn't still contain kitchen roll and inedible sponges.

"We've been over this a hundred times, B, just because you say it's happened in a stern newsreader-y voice doesn't mean it's actually happened" sighed Tesla, who was sat at a table frantically trying to learn all tomorrow's headlines.

"Well it should!", sulked Sissons, "I didn't fake an injury to get off early and not get pastries! This just in: you are ugly and smell awful!"

The door to the kitchen opened suddenly, revealing a horrible mass of charred ash and hair on legs

"Oh hey Kirsty", said Tesla without looking up, "how long until the lightning bolt wears off?"

"Just... shut up" she muttered through cracked lips.

"Ooh, idea!", beamed Sissons, "Could you magic up some pastries?"

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And that's the last thing I remember before I woke up in hospital

BRING FOOD”