“FUMBBL SMACK Sched LEG CIX - Final

Coming into this game, the 'Saws had only ever lost to pro elves in 3 previous encounters.

With a 2nd SMACK title in the sights, Coach Chainsaw spent hours drafting detailed strategies and precise plays. In fact, all night was spent adjusting to last minute discoveries from scout reports of his elf opponents. Without sleep, he was seen dozing for the majority of the match in his seat.

With nobody to direct them, the orcs just did what orcs do best; smash things.

Despite the ludicrous rate with which elves were leaving the field, including a serious injury on a dodge, Dollhouse still stole the ball to take the lead following a freak failed orc block (quad skulls). Fortunately this was the only bad luck the 'Saws would experience, and the orcs own freakily agile lineman passed it clear for a half time equalizer despite the attentions of a pass blocker. It could have been very different, after the wayward orcs forgot to cover Hothammer as he backed off alone - had the wizard not fizzled, it may have been 2-0 with the elves to receive in the 2nd half!

With numbers rapidly dwindling, Adelle, the only elf to show up, managed to recover the ball for 2-1 after the original ball carrier had been knocked out - left exposed by yet another elf who fell over (one of several snakes).

With just 4 elves to defend the orc reply, it was becoming an increasingly desperate situation for Azure and Adelle. Then it was 3, then 2, and just Adelle and another elf body remained as the 2nd and 3rd orc touchdowns were scored. The fumbled punt attempt summed up Coach Azure's afternoon.

Coach Chainsaw awoke to find his players celebrating another legend SMACK title. Dollhouse live to fight another day - except for their dirty player who the apothecary could not heal. Rumours of the apothecary's wife being caught eloping with the then-alive elf were soon put to rest by a team mate, who preferred to remain anonymous when quoted, "Everybody got a go!"”