“The ARR season is underway with the Mimes taking to the high seas. Near a small archapelago they see a ship heavy laden with booty riding low in the waters. Hoisting the black flag the pull along side of her only to find no treasure gally but a pirate vessel weighted down by ogres. Captain Kryten at the helm. A tiny snotling stands in the crows nest holding his own black flag that clearly no one had paid attention to.

Both ships set broadside with cannos primed to send the other to a meeting with Davey Jones. Parlay came the shout from the captain's helm. Clearly Captain Kryten was the wiser and more experienced of the two. Nodding in agreement, the two captains met ashore.

The wiely Kryten laid out the terms. A blood bowl match with the winning ship having rights to any booty to be found on the island. Coach Kondor sized up both crews and determined he had a bit of an advantage. Five ogres and a mess of snots against his nimble lads. Deal he grumbled trying to make it look like he knew he had been swindled. He spat on his hand and extended it to Kryten.

The match began at dawn. The ogres took the kick off. The elves followed the plan perfectly by moving quickly into the opponent backfield. Then the unexplainable happened. The tackle breaking ogre ran over and easily picked up the ball. The elves wer going to have to break their own rules and try to bring down one of the monsters. It moved along the sidelines and the silent mime rushed into position bodying up against the monster. A flury of boneheads left the monster exposed and as it blitzed to push Dominique away, she managed to put him on the ground with a nifty judo move. She dodged, made a qucik pass to Aimee, who handed it to Helewise running into the clear. They would stall away until scoring to end the half.

In the second half the worm turned. The elves simply lost their land legs. They could not figure out how to bring down a behemoth, and they could not dodge away without tripping. As desperation set in, they found a tiny opening. A pass to the marked catcher could have her break away for an insurance point. Alass it was not to be. The oversized, doubly marked ogre intercepted the pass and from then on the only question was when they would equalize.

With a tie ball game, there was nothing more to be done. The contract clearly stated they would split anything found on the island. Still Kondor was unsatisfied. Next time he thought. Next time.”