“Thar' be a party in Sartosa tonight.

Cap'n Neri led th' Shipwrecks t' a great victory against local rivals th' Clams in last nights cup match. Th' Shipwrecks started kickin' 'n with a strong defence we be seein' Lazzaro knock th' ball free, close t' midway through th' 'alf. Little Vito was eventually able to get th' ball and free 'n run in th' Touchdown.

Th' 2nd 'alf saw th' Shipwrecks confound th' clams with a classic switch play. Pinnin' 'alf th' Clams t' one side o' th' pitch while Pipes moved t' th' opposite side o' th' field, runnin' in th' Touchdown.

Kickin' again this time saw Rocco take another strong block, which be seein' him stretchered o' th' pitch again. He be claimin' t' have a serious concussion, but he be his normal drunk self t' me. Th' Shipwrecks be gettin' th' ball off o' them Clams again. This time Lazzaro had t' honour o' runnin' in th' Touchdown.

With th' game all but over Journeyman William Hardfield came face t' face with Black Bas and be learnin' his last lesson in this life. Ye best not be blockin' Black Bas. Hardfiels corpse be vanishin' soon after th' game 'n has yet t' be found.”