“First time playing a bunch of asses. As in all we saw of them the whole game was their asses as they ran for touchdowns. As coach Snailbarf put it at the end of the game, "they either wear their uniforms backward or we just got whipped,"

Some minor concern from the opponent about the fouling, but those size 2 boots weren't going to hurt him anywayz. Highlight of the match was finding out that Hail Mary doesn't work for a Treeman, though he completed his pass anyway, but the guy got leveled shortly after dusting himself off.

Terrance Nuggetlover emerges as the primary Halfling threat, gaining his second TD. That means he's sure to die next game.

Bottom line. Our boys couldn't beat their Gutter Runners in a fair fight today. Maybe a stricter diet will get the lads in shape for their next outing.”