“Diane, it's 8:37 PM and I've just put the finishing touches on our case. I know who killed Laura Palmer: Vampires! That's right, there are Vampires in Twin Peaks. I came across this goth looking bunch at Horne's Department Store; what passes for a mall in this quaint little town. They were hanging around the perfume counter, but they started acting suspicious as soon as we showed up. When I tried to question them, they attempted to run. I was able to chase 'em down and get the information I needed from them. Sam and I had to use some extreme interrogation methods, but that's what you do when you're in a small town and the locals won't talk to you. Most of the short time I've spent here I've been met with nothing but courtesy, but it seems every town has a bad element. I don't want to brag, but I had a triple double and was just an INT short of a perfect larson. Sam, Bobby, and Dr. Jacoby all contributed their fair share too. Gordon and Bobby are sharing a room at Twin Peaks Memorial Hospital, I'll catch up with 'em after dinner.

Now that this case is wrapped up, I'll have to see where Gordon wants me next. Until then, you can find me in room 316, at the Great Northern Hotel.

Medical Report: Bobby gave us quite the scare, but Sam patched him up enough to get him to the hospital. He'll live, but he'll be out a game. Gordon can keep him company. Nothing will speed recovery like a few of Gordon's stories.

Financial Report: We shook the vamps down for cash and got another good haul. This will help get that replacement for Dennis, I mean Denise, I mentioned before. I'm hoping the next case keeps me in this area, it's growing on me.

Epilogue: Diane, due to a 'procedural' issue, the evidence from this investigation will not be included in the overall case. Something about not getting it in before midnight CET time zone. That's hogwash to me, but a Bureau man must follow the rules even when they are an impediment to justice. This 36 point game would have pushed us into 2nd place in the E.L.F. standings, but alas we finished 4th. So it looks like I'll be staying in Twin Peaks for a while longer.”