“Varag Ghoul-Chewer led the Gouged Eye onto the field for their opening match of the season - an all orc match up against BBC Zelezne sklady. Calling 'Eds' correctly Varag chose to receive the kick off. With rumours of Eye 'chukka' Harg Vainkill's retirement rife, Varag himself took up position deep to play in the quarterback position. And they were off!

As the kick was made the excitement amongst the raucous crowd spilled over into a riot. The ref finally managed to restore order but not before some potentially crucial time was lost on the clock. The Eye offence, led by vice-captain Krug Painspear, flattened their opposing numbers on the line of scrimmage before Eye blocker Da Rock charged through the gap to blitz thrower Gomoku. Varag scooped up the ball behind a double screen of Eye team mates.

The two orc teams faced of in the centre of the field with neither side giving quarter. Looking for an opening Varag ordered the Eye first to break to the right, and then sensing that their opposition were slightly out of position broke left. Shielded by his team mates Varag flanked the opposition and as he approached the endzone it fell to Varag to blitz past opposition blitzer Sugba to run in the touchdown. 1-0 to the Gouged Eye.

Setting up his defence for the return drive Varag was unimpressed to see his team outnumbered 11-9 with two of his blitzers reduced to the injury section of his dugout. With only a short time to defend remaining in the half Varag set his defence deep and took the kick himself, landing it deep in the opposition half. As Gomoku retrieved the ball looking for a pass, blitzer Taghig ran wide left looking to play catcher. Varag reading the play blitzed Taghig to the ground and shortly afterwards the ref blew his whistle for half time.

The second half started with the Eye outnumbered 11-10 after Krug Painspear shrugged off his first half KO. Zelezne skalady broke on both flanks as Gomoko picked up the ball. Varag however saw the opportunity and dodged passed the defensive line to blitz and KO Gomoko! Now both teams descended on the loose ball in a midfield melee. Finally it was Eye linorc Gurk Halftoad who emerged out of the dust cloud with the ball. Presumably disorientated, the short orc rookie started running toward the wrong endzone! The Zelezne skalady blitzers were soon after him but one of them tripped, a second was flattened by Da Rock as a third tackled by Urfik Skullhack. Varag bellowed in fury at Halftoad who veered around and started hurtling along the far touchline. Skullhack turned around to take out the fourth opposing blitzer as Krug Painspear and Varag both lost their markers looking for the pass that would set them away for a second touchdown. The ref looked at his watch ad brought the whistle to his lips...

Halftoad - who had never run so far in his life - handed the ball of to Painspear and with great relief watched the vice-captain run in the touchdown. The ref whistled for the end of play. Gouged Eye 2-0 BBC Zelezne sklady.

Interviewed after the match the winning team captain had this to say:
"Da boyz wuz erbit rustee, but Iz drag'd em fru. Wun it zingle andid, dunno wi Ugly wuz givun da MVP, day wuz wutchin a diffrunt game!"

(Thanks for the game)



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