“A modest undead team tried our shop today, but I'm afraid the heat was far too much for their cold, dead hands, our climate control system just couldn't keep up. Not good for customer satisfaction I tell you, they've returned all the casualties they took with interest, though we did give them a nice death. Funeral pies all around!

They received, their line rather ineffectual and their stronger ghoul failing the pickup. Leif couldn't manage the throw over the top to capitalise, and they recovered, with just Wrecked Elbow over the top to try and strip it (soon knocked out for his troubles). Their mummies guarded the ball carrier well, so Clive took out the other ghoul instead. Delightful. Still, the ball went ahead and we couldn't make the dodges to blitz, so they ran it away from the feeding Clive and set to stalling out the half. Both trees were in traffic, but the cleared the lot off the field, good work, Gunner picking up a cas too when a Zombie skulled him, clever work.

Remarkable thing, Leif then threw him at their blitzer, only one in range near the ball, and hit him off the field for the day! Brilliant. Must try again, though neither player is awarded a casualty in the records.

The young lad then helped their stall into the end zone. The crowd was so impressed the ref gave us extra time to score! Lovely, and them with just six on the field in the heat, one a kicker, bad luck. Clive this time wasn't able to make the throw after the ball was bought up, dodged away well, but I'd had to scream at Post Trauma to catch the handoff. That boy, so much potential.

Second half, them down to just five. What luck. We took our time and knocked them about a bit, Post Trauma running down and trying his hand at stalling. That big ghoul though, so hard to tie down, we just had to pick it up again and score.

They killed Wrecked Elbow on the kickoff, gave themselves 3 turns for a long run in with their six, Clive resting from the heat. Their ghoul drew us to one wing and away up the other on its own. It was all we could do to stop the scoring chance, pushing it away from our line, no real chance to get anyone in range of a score for the hopeful pass with only one tree busy clearing paths.

But a draw is better than we've had in a while, help of the heat or no. Sales were disappointing, but that's soon made up next visit. Well done lads, enjoy the funeral.”