“Well, after the last rort was so well publicised, it seemed more Secrecy was in order on this one. Deeply hidden Secrecy, tucked away where no one would find it.

Nepotism lead to Secrecy, Anarchy was unleashed, but an Extortion attempt blew up in our face, playing dead under their boot to get of the field, and Bribery off the same way. Sneaky. A great block of the Money stood in the path of Thieving, but Secrecy was in order and it was Corruption tucked him away. Two for a badge they say, not quite that hungry today. We left them to sprint off with the ball and score, Graft slowing their progress, Kickbacks messing them up, Thieving at the ball, but the Money is comfortable with such things and scored at their leisure.

We got the ref to hand them a new ball in the second, Graft used to retrieve it through the fans. Our ringer, Fungus for us this time, kicked it, we gave the nod to their B&C and he returned the favour, knocking down his own man. That'll cost us, but seemed a sound bet. Intimidation in play, easier near the ball, Fungus cleared this time and the ball was away to Ransom. Their big troll couldn't take it, Corruption pushing the Ransom up with him, all but out of their reach. Their bomber "fumbled" the long save, and we waited for them to help us over the line, which they did in turn after Fungus spun out.

Then Nepotism crashed, and they in. Obviously more Money in a win for them. Not much Bribery and Corruption left, really. Corruption did not throw Ransom away at the end, "so sad".

And what's the damage? The team remains "strangely" bereft of funds. Investors get nothing. Graft's out, Secrecy is securely in place, and this league thing promises to be a non-stop feast of Bribery and Corruption. So long as there's money in losing, we may remain bottom of the table for some time. Of course, it's all random, and anything can happen in a game of sportsball. Praise Nuffle, I'm off to count the coach's paycheck.”