“The travelling team have brought a whole lot of fans, seems like this could give the Harbringers and advantage…

Kickoff and the U-dogs’ attack down the flank is quickly squished by the Harbringers’ Saurus, the ball goes loose and is gathered by Skink Eddie who runs into the empty midfield. Mysterious clouds gather around Eddie’s head zapping him with magical bolts of lightning, Eddie is ok but his progress down the field has been halted. Fr’bloo grabs the ball out of Eddies twitching hands and launches a pass down field to Ber’anx who blitzes past his marker to score 1-0 U-dogs, but at a cost, the U-dog’s gobbo shaman’s head seems to have exploded due to the sudden influx of Waaargh energy from the celebrating U-dog fans, so no more TD saving spells until they find another wizard willing to risk cranial catastrophe for the sake of the beautiful and bloody game.

On restart the Harbringers perform a textbook collection of the ball and form a loose box around the ball carrier. U-dogs throw up a defensive line but fail to account for the sheer speed of the Lizardmen and the Harbringers flow their box effortlessly around the end of the U-dog defence to score.

Fr’bloo catches the return kickoff and hands off to She-est ready to be launched down field by Gerald. Unfortunately Gerald misheard and thought was ready to be lunch, only some quick wriggling saves the gobbo ball carrier (and possibly the ball) from being swallowed whole. The U-dogs form a cage to try and protect She-est, who is understandably disturbed by his recent experience, but the sheer strength and speed of the Harbrings’ players allows them to break through to sack the shocked ball carrier and only the half time whistle stops the troglodyte team from scoring a second TD.

In what must be the moment of the match, just as the second half is about to get underway, a vast swarm of Skinks pour onto the pitch from the visitors stands, hissing and snapping the slimy reptiles smash into the U-dogs like some sort of enraged scaly tidal wave. Overwhelmed by numbers every single member of the U-dogs team except Gerald is left stunned on the ground * and the Harbringers simply walk the ball past the prone U-dogs for what must be their easiest ever score 2-1 to Harbringers.

The heavens open, pouring rain starts to turn the pitch into a swamp which makes the visiting Lizardmen feel right at home and makes the ball as difficult to handle as a greased tree squig. After much slipping and sliding around in the mud by both sides Harbringer Skink Hector manages to hold on to the ball long enough to scamper in for TD three.

With time running down on the clock and two scores behind the U-dogs line up for a TTM attempt. The pitch is still muddy and the ball is still hard to handle, to make matters worse the U-dogs’ thrower, Fr’bloo, is out injured with a fractured leg. The ball lands, D’enthee successfully gathers and sprints to She-est, handoff… Gerald picks up the understandably nervous She-est and throws him deep behind the Harbringer lines. She-est lands sliding through the mud all the way into the endzone for the U-dogs first ever 1 turn TD!

A second pitch invasion by rabid skinks again takes down half of the U-dogs team and the match is over bar the recriminations, final score 3-2 to the Harbringers.

* Yes, a pitch invasion took down 10 of my players, I had to find out how likely that was so some quick calculations later and I found out that even with an opponent with FAME of +2 the chances of losing 10 or more players to pitch invasion at any one kickoff is less than 1:3200 the unpronounceable gods of Lustreria were smiling on the Harbringers today
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