“Frankly, this was a dead game for us, as nothing short of the Second Coming could lift this team from the squalid basement realm at the very bottom of the league, so why does handing the other team a draw with a failed T16 GFI stab at my soul like the poisoned blade of Azrael the angel of death? Still some shreds of hope that have yet to be completely battered into compliance. Nurse, the mallet.

Well, all right: the first half TD for the Orcs was largely due to the Wood Elves obligingly throwing the ball into the crowd, and it had clearly been decreed the Wood Elves were destined to score back, given they intercepted the ball twice in the second half despite the Orcs breathing down their necks, but even so... No-one died. We didn't actually lose. And yet those normally comforting words have an ashy taste like never before... ”