“MLS Season 25 Game 5

Ye olde dice and a turn 1 rock deprived us of any chance of winning this game, but ye Red Wolves tenacity managed to keep our undefeated streak alive. Ye olde armour rolls were abysmal and ye olde KO rolls were crap as well. Even ye olde apothecary could only give us a choice between -AG and -AV on Armando. Yet in spite of all these obstacles we still managed to hang onto ye olde draw thanks to Ian Christianson and Bradley Wright-Phillips. Ian truly deserves ye olde MVP for that pickup and handoff. I hope ye Filthy WAAAGH! treats Callas as fondly as they treated us. Meanwhile, it's on to Seattle for ye Red Wolves and most likely our first loss of ye olde season to ye luckiest, most undeserving Lizards in ye New World. We're just playing for CAS in that game, boys. Let's hope ye Filthy WAAAGH! softens those scalies up for us.

notes - Lord Borak ye Despoiler must truly be near ye end of his career if he's playing in ye olde MLS.

Spectators - Helloo and some coward who ducked out before ye final whistle. I bet was a man on a horse.

Update - ye filthy orcs failed on both counts. worthless waaagh.”