“Greetings Bloodbowlers! This is the game summary for the final Unicorn Game in the Schola Conference. It's all from memory, so the details may be incorrect... I will replay the match and adjust the match report later this week.

With trepidation the disheartened Unicorns presented onto the field. The match had been delayed and tensions were high from both the vamp and orc fans. A win to the New World Winers and Diners could catapult them into the Prems and the Unicorn coach had been given a rousing speech from Ramchop that his hopes of a Premier entry next season rested on the performance of the dubious orcs after a stirling performance by Irgy's Nurgle team breathed life into Ramchop's dreams of making the big league!

The teams prepared themselves and the fans in the bleachers screamed themselves hoarse! Jim in the commentator box listened carefully and could detect that the passion was slightly higher for the vampire team and so the Winers and Diners took the FAME (+1). The Unicorns won the kick and debated what to do - the team weights were markedly different and to make the match "more sporting" the Bloodbowl League Committee had slipped the vampire coach a hefty wad of cash to buy "performance enhancers" to balance the scales (hey it is Bloodbowl).

mOg opted for a sideline wizard, a dirty trick card, a magic trick card and 2 pale Succubus from the Bloodweiser Brewery to rouse their stunned players to greater efforts should they take one too many knocks to the head (a wise choice!)

With a swift prayer to Nuffle, the Orc coach decided to receive the kick and do his best to grind the Vamp team to bonemeal. Kickoff was good and Nuffle seemed to be listening to the Unicorns this day, with a swag of casualties, stuns and KOs. The early departure of Viscount Arnaud Papillon was a blessing, as was a failure to remove the serious injury by either the team's overpaid apothecary or his own native regeneration abilities - poor Arnaud did not dance like a butterfly, he must've been stung by a bee...

The first half went the Orc's way with only a handful of vampires and thralls left on the pitch, they spent the last 3 turns on the dirt without even bothering with playing the game and the fans were not happy. Annoyed at the lack of grit from the vampire team, the Unicorn players gathered around the closest vampire and repeatedly laid in the boot, but to no great effect. The vampire must have rolled with the kicks and punches and looked none the worse for wear. Just moments before halftime, the Orcs scored the first touchdown of the game and lined up for the possibility of a vampire retribution touchdown.

Perfect defense on the kick-off and the Unicorns (bravely?) or (stupidly) tried to put a brickwall in front of the vampires on the sideline. The coach forgot about the insidious gaze of the vampires and Luke Skywalker found himself without the strong support of his sister Leia. The vampires blocked him over and the opportunity to do lasting harm to the emerging star was too tempting to refuse... Vampires and thralls alike swarmed the downed Jedi and swung the boot - the ref looked the other way, but Luke soaked his punishment and remained undeterred, ready to return for the fresh drive. Nice work Luke!

Second Half.
The busty Succubus carrying their magical bloodweiser beverages did the trick and all of the Winers and Diners that had been knocked out, were brought back to consciousness and were ready to retake the field.

On the initial drive the vampires put everything into a quick touchdown opportunity as they were in dire need of a win to secure their chances of making the holy grail of SWL Bloodbowl - the Premier League! The vampires blitzed deeply into the Orc's half of the field and the used their daemonic powers to hypnotize players and apply tackle zones to screen the ball carrying vampire from an Orcish blitz. By the time the orcs had shaken off the effects of the hypnotic gaze they were startled to see the vampire team in an almost unassailable position... Or were they?

Luke Skywalker had stayed deep and managed to break away and blitz the strong, agile vampire within easy reach of the touchdown line. His superior strength gave him every chance to knock down the vampire, but the surefooted vamp kept his feet. Luke cunningly pushed him into range of Han solo, didn't follow-up, then stepped in sideways to provide a well placed assist to Han. Han was frothing at the mouth, how DARE these vampires use such underhanded tactics to score a touchdown!? Flying into a frenzy he blocked hard against the vampire, but couldn't budge him... NO! Digging deep (burning a reroll), Han shoved hard and pushed the vampire against the sideline. Did he stop there? NOOOO, with a herculean effort he surfed the offending vampire off the pitch and into the safe embrace of a cluster of vampire fans. One of the loyal fans scooped up the ball and threw it straight to their favourite vampire star who caught the ball, who then flashed him a grin and a wink. Damnit! The orcs scrambled around the remaining vampire in range to score and a brave lineorc rushed towards the new ball-carrying vampire to apply pressure to their star quarterback. *Gulp*

The vampire fans were going crazy! First they looked set to score, then their beloved vampire was blitzed from the field of play and safely shepherded to the dugouts to await the new drive. Then one of their own fans threw the ball back into play and into the sure hands of one of their star players. What an up and down match! The vampire team blitzed away the offending lineorc from their quarterback and then set to with their hypnotic gaze. In short, the vampires ran to the touchdown line, handed off to another vampire who raced forward and threw to their open receiver.... who caught it! WOW - the vampires claw the score back to 1 - 1 with a wizard still in their back pocket to swing the match...

The vampires still had 6 turns to force a turn-over and although they had 1 vampire and 3 thralls off either badly hurt or seriously injured, they started the drive with a full field of players, eager to cause mayhem to the orcish side.

The orcs started well, scooping up the ball and then passing to the goblin who hung back. On the next turn, the orcs tried to be fancy but stuffed up when trying to get the ball to Han Solo. A tense moment where the vampires swooped in to nab the ball, but on the next Orc turn, some solid blitzing by Han Solo knocked over the ball carrier and Han grabbed the ball off the bounce. The goblin was again given the ball, but the wizard struck sending Jaja biggs off the field with a concussion. Luckily, the ball scattered well and lay under the protective embrace of Leia and her trusty fellow orcs. Some tussling occurred, but swift work saw Han Solo with the ball and racing deep into the Vampire half with Luke Skywalker running interference. The Orc team decided not to drag out the clock, Han ran in a comfortable touch down with 2 turns left for the vampires to try and even the score.

The Orcs presented a staggered defense and the vampires looked scared and ran deep into their own half with the ball. In a "no guts, no glory" motto, Han Solo blitzed the ball free and attempted to both dodge, go for it and pick up the ball in the vampire touchdown zone, with a very pissed off vampire beside him. Unfortunately, this last chance for a touchdown did not succeed, but the flamboyance of the attempt had the fans screaming and rattling the bleachers with their stomping feet.

A strong finish to the Unicorn's otherwise lacklustre season. However, the game did provide an excellent learning environment, with three Unicorn players earning a skill to add to their growing repertoire of Bloodbowl strengths.

Next Season, may be an interesting one for the Orc side.”