“Goblins are tough - don't let anyone tell you otherwise. And the Revelleerz are tough goblins. They have two trolls who are both ST6 with Block, an absolutely evil fanatic who thinks nothing of blocking his own players - even the trolls - out of his way, and even the basic goblins are annoying beyond belief - we'll the two with diving tackle were, anyway.

It was never going to be an easy game, but I made things a lot worse for myself by cowardly keeping the tree as far away from the trolls as possible. Yes, this did mean he survived the game, but it also meant he did very little all game apart from push a couple of goblins about and not cause any injuries.

The Revelleerz kicked off, and after a bit of running downfield, I managed to muff my first pass. To be fair, the pass was fine, it was the catch that was terrible (what with the rain and all), but at least the ball landed safely between the tree and the useless catcher. And on my following turn, I did what I do best and hurled a long bomb all the way down into the endzone for a score - failing the catch again, but this time managing it with a reroll.

On offense, dabassman took things slow and was careful to make sure his ball-carrier was always well protected. I had high hopes of cage-breaking with my two war dancers - especially the AG5 one, but my first attempt at a leap left me flat on my face.

But then I got a lucky break, when the chainsaw kicked back and caused a turnover, while the ball-carrier was exposed. I got in there, got the ball free and scored two turns later.

This left dabassman with two turns to get on the board, and with goblin-hurling trolls, this was perfectly feasible. Sadly for the goblins though, the troll failed his always hungry on the first attempt and the goblin failed his landing on the second.

2-0 at the half.

But in the meantime, one of my wardancers had been killed and a catcher badly hurt. I also managed to pick up some reluctant KOs, so I began the second half - on defence - several men down. And despite my best efforts (which were, to be honest, somewhat cowardly and half-hearted), the goblins ran in their first score.

I had plenty of time for another score, and I could have done it easily if I hadn't been so useless. Okay, so I didn't have many players left, but my cunning offensive drive left me with a single catcher within scoring range - until he was removed from the field anyway. In the end, there was more chance of the Revelleerz making a late score, but the combination of the rain and the awkward placement of the ball meant I survived the late threat and scraped the win.

So a dead wardancer - which obviously, I should have used the app on, but didn't - but apart from that the game was not too bad. I was expecting a lot worse and I was lucky the secret weapons weren't really firing on all cylinders today.

Not enough cash to replace the wardancer, sadly, but I did pick up some fans and the passing was respectable, if not impressive.

But I'm officially fed up with the weather. The game I'm currently in the middle of is being fought in a permanent blizzard, and the last two completed games have been start-to-finish rain. And the one before that was sunny for most of it. And why do all weather options affect the passing game? Okay, apart from sweltering heat. Why can't we have something like, HEATWAVE - you're so hot and sweaty you can't be bothered to hit very hard. Mighty Blow has no effect until the weather changes.

Yeah, I Like that one.”