“Fast and Furious - and remarkably painless, all things considered. The Amazons were in top form today and pounded the wood elves into the dirt. Whereas the wood elves showed themselves to be as soft as kittens and as weak as even smaller kittens. I spent much of my time on the deck, and my blocking was adequate when it made no difference and either really unlucky, or really useless, when it really mattered.

The first score was quick and easy. I sent enough people downfield to receive the pass that even with the Amazons dealing with the catchers and wardancers, there was still a spare lineman to make the catch and run it in.

The Amazon's first offence drive was all about chainsawing the tree, with the entire team apart from the thrower who was collecting the ball busy either blocking the linemen around him or providing a guard wherever possible. But despite everything, Helmut failed to do any damage.

Not to worry though, because the very next turn the tree rolled a double skull and failed his loner, leaving him on the floor at the feet of the chainsaw, and with most of the rest of the Amazon team standing beside him. Buzzzzzzzzzz.....

...MNG. I can live with that.

The rest of the half was stale of Amazons knocking down wood elves and making sure they were going to score in turn 8. They were, needless to say, successful at both.

The second half began with a blitz for me - which I will just say is both unfair and really, really annoying for the offence - but despite me getting four players deep into the Amazon half and putting all the nearby threats into TZs, the Amazons just knocked me over, their thrower dodged free and picked up the ball and left me with two stunned wardancers and no one available to make the blitz for the ball except two catchers. Still, that was enough to give me a 1-dice, so I gave it a go.

And rolled a skull, without reroll.

So there then followed another eight turns of the wood elves being pounded into the dirt while the thrower ran the ball up into safety. On my turn 7 I did, however, manage to get into position for another 1-dice blitz with a tackling wardancer. Even a pushback would have been something, but no, I was rewarded with another skull.

And then just when I needed some bad blocking dice, my final 1-turn attempt was ruined by my inability to roll anything except a knock-down on his linewoman.

Oh well, as I said, it was a relatively painless drubbing as drubbings go, and the fact that the tree is missing a game allows me to try something I've been meaning to do for a while now - but if you want to know what it is you'll have to read my next match report!

Thanks for the game madmatt13. Once the tree was safe, I really enjoyed it!”