“The Bonds, showing the great honour of the British Secret Service, fouled viciously and blatantly, but failed to score. Some kind of metaphor there for something there?

Down to 9 men at the half and without managing to get the ball in the end zone, they were then pummelled by the LavaBulls, and were incapable of putting the hurt on anyone. In a final burst of madness, with MrCushtie forgetting he wasn't coaching goblins, they went in for a T16 gang foul, but again their spiky boots slithered off their enemy's armour.

They'll be lingering somewhere in Southern Wastes, looking for a scrap at some later date. Back to our regular goblin show soon.”