“There are games when the dice are against you, and then there is what Nadytractor had to deal with. The humans received, and the kickoff roll: a Blitz. I put pressure on the ball and even after they picked up the ball and threw it to a flank where I was open, I forced them to switch sides and had a numerical advantage in the new position of the ball, I got it loose and it bounced around for a few turns before Skandrus Smeltbane, my rookie Runner, picked it up, and I caged and scored Turn 8. 1-0 up and receiving as Dwarfs. This is good.
I then had a Quick Snap, obliterated their Line and moved the ball up the pitch. The next few turns were mostly the humans breaking some of my cage, but then me reforming it on my next turn further up the pitch. However, this put me under too much pressure to stall past Turn 6. The kickoff table, once again, took care of that! A riot moved the clock forwards, and, to sum up the Humans’ day, they fumbled the vanity pass at the end of the game. Thanks Nadytractor, and may Nuffle compensate you forever for this horror show!”