“What a match! The Ultimate Warriors knew they were going to need to bring their A game to take down knine's undefeated Nuffle Kerfuffle, who not only came prepared with their excellent team (boasting a move 10 gutter runner) but called in a few favors to hire Hemlock (giving them two stabbers) and a saw.

Lining up on the LOS, His Exalted Lordship, James of Midlake eyed the opposing Kroxigor and called dibs... then promptly rolled double skulls, which left the ball and chain hanging in the wind (he would be badly hurt turn 1). With the offense in trouble, Gor-Varlish tossed a pass to our newest recruit, Brynhildr the Valkyrie catcher, who caged up midfield. The big guys got back into things, and after knine's own big went for double skulls, we were able to safely hang out by the endzone (though we chanced not calling in the apothecary for a risky SI on Kelly, who luckily regenerated - she would be instrumental in the second half).

The Kerfuffle tried getting their gutter into range by pushing Crugg the troll around, but missed the final dodge and we were on to the second half up 1-0. The kick went deep, with Hemlock, Captain Obvious, and their assassin covering, but when Odster came in to foul Kelly he slipped and impaled himself on his chainsaw, leaving the ball un-carried. Captain Obvious eventually grabbed the rock, but the Warriors were closing in and he needed to make a big play. He dodged away from Lady Matilda and threw a beautiful spiral to Cindy Lou... who accidentally bobbled the ball, which fell into the hands of Alayna, our Amazon blitzer! At this point Kelly, who was fed up with all the saws and fouls, got her tentacles around Cindy Lou and held on for the rest of the match. While Hemlock did manage to stab the ball free, the Kerfuffle kept missing the decisive dodges and Gor-Varlish punched it in on T16.

For his hard work, Gor-Varlish earned Dodge, while the fans, obviously snickering as they did so, voted Madeye Sally, the ball and chain who never even took an action, MVP.

”