“Well Glam fans, this time the Thin Black Prince showered their favour again (and probably other ethereal bodily secretions) on the The Glam at Surimicorp Stadium.

Some incredible dodging from the Glam, guest performances by Fat Glart and Scylla, and some unlucky pick ups from The Wounders allowed the Stardust Crustaceans to tie up 4th place for the season.

The Glam burst into the Stadium with a choreographed performance of their hit 'Prince Bitch' with Glamina on lead vocals. The crowd went wild for the performance and in a frenzy they swamped Glamina during the kickoff.

This didn't stop the Glam who in the following minutes took two of The Wounders off the pitch. Enraged, Tad the gobbo fouled Glamina. The ref spotted the foul but Coach Ramchop argued that Tad accidentally stepped on Glamina after being blinded by the floodlights reflected in their rhinestone chaps... while this creative truth kept Tad on the field it led to a turnover which left the Wounders' ball carrier open.

Sequin Groover spotted the opportunity and pounced on the ball carrier (Wayne the gobbo) and sashayed him away. Sequin then synced for their life and ran towards the Wounders' endzone to put distance between them and trolls.

But the Wounders were able to mark Sequin with a troll and a gobbo, but nothing could stop Sequin. With a sickening flick of their hair Sequin sissied that walk and dodged away to safety.  The crowd, the Wounders, and the Prince of Pain were all enraptured by the fierce strut. The Glam picked up the cue and dodged away from all the players marking them, tumbling into a two-high pyramid before forming a screen around Sequin.

The Glam then ran Sequin up the pitch scoring in the last seconds of the half. With the trolls left far behind the snots and gobbos weren't enough to stop the music.

Following this the Glam got a a bit overconfident in their ability to whump gobbos and snots. Shitgoat once again, although in style this time, crapped out. The Shitgoat pushed prematurely for a winning TD. Meters from the Glam's endzone Shitgoat, behind a screen of several Glam backup dancers, started doing the choreography to the Bethany Pikes pop hit 'I'm a Slave for You'. Distracted by the accolades from the crowd the Glam let two gobbos and a snot (Colin: who made five dodges with ease) through the screen. Shitgoat went down dropping the ball which landed in the hands of a surpised Gobbo: Lyn. 

The Glam blitz Lyn, but can't take her down. Surrounded by Crabs, Lyn dodges for glory three times before handing off to Wayne who runs like shiny slimy maritime buggery down the field. For a moment it seems no one can catch him. Scylla roars incoherently in rage, Colin the snot ties up four Crabs, but Messiah Nefrat manages to break free. 

Chaos Gods know, Gods know they want to break free. For the first time this season they know it's for real and 'Messi' manages to knock Wayne down... and themselves.

Scotty the gobbo runs up to assist Wayne valiantly get back up .. and flub the pick up. Scylla starts thinking about blitzing Scotty but is so angry about being left out of two choreographies he simply roars in fury. 'Messi' knows it is all up to them, but all they can manage is to stand up to tag the ball. Wayne goes for a final pickup in a single tackle zone to win the game and flubs again.

One nil to The Glam thanks to The Perfect Prince intervening with Nuffle on those final two pickups by Wayne the Gobbo.”