“Well football fans, The Skabs seemed to have healed somewhat in their sophomore performance today. Although given how bloody the game was, and how many unsuccessful regenerations there were, that analogy may not have been the most apropo. The THC were able to score early in the piece but The Skabs slowly congealed around The THC until there wasn't enough to be effective.

I've been speaking to Necromancer Chappedman and he tells me he attributes The Skabs' success to improved showmanship. I'm not so sure about this. Despite the pyrotechnics and loud, thick, monumental distorted guitars, the Skabs' performance of the team anthem 'Unholy Driver' left the crowd unimpressed. So much so that one spectator even threw a rock at Amethyst Cobweb as The Skabs made their first kick-off to The THC.

However, this commentator's view is that the main driver of The Skab's improved form is due to a certain Gloriosa consuming some performance diminishing substances. Gloriosa only got two blocks in during the game. She started with knocking a flesh golem down ... and herself. After this The Skabs were all over her like a scabby rash on Ace Scaley's privates. The Skabs fouled her again and again until finally Alisson 'Coffin' Cooper stomped on her head hard enough to send her off the pitch. Despite there being another four drives following this Gloriousa didn't come to for the rest of the match.

However, the ref was watching and called that fateful foul. Chappedman used his knowledge of death magic to confuse, or maybe bore, the ref into letting Coffin stay on the field. Whatever Chappedman said, the ref was either so impressed, or disgusted, that they ignored all fouls for the rest of the game. Which is just as well for the Skabs as they fouled another two players into the injury box and Coffin sent two more there with blocks (while also scoring a touchdown).

With the Skabs preoccupied gang fouling Gloriosa, the THC were able to hand-off to Artemesia who made it just short of the endzone and completely out of range of all of the Skabs. Which the Skabs didn't seem to mind at all. They instead focussed on rhythmically bashing their unthinking heads against elves and sprites (I don't think I ever want to hear Unholy Driver again). Shortly, with The Skabs' numerical advantage and the threat of more fouls/casualties, THC were forced to score.

With this early score, the THC's big-gal off the field, and up on strong (if rotting) bodies , the Skabs were able to build an almost unstoppable wall of flesh for the remaining drives. In all the scabs knocked out 3 and injured 5 (two by foul). Outnumbered, the THC weren't able to stop The Skabs from winning the game 2 - 1.”