“Good afternoon sports fans and welcome to the grandest sport of them all. Blood Bowl! My name is Merlin Oldson and it is my pleasure to take up the mic and bring you all your Legionnaire games this season. This year we start the season with a home game from the Mordheim Colloseum. Management says the stadium holds 50,000 fans and looking down on the sea of Crimson, White and Black clad fans I have no need to doubt the claim.

The Legion is lead by the third year coach known as Kondor. His play style as caught the attention of the league. The normal defensive game plan is to knock down an opposing player, surround it, then send in Chris "Bloody Knuckles" Jones to convince them to leave the pitch. He is a smooth negotiator as last year he led the league in fouling with over 100 on the season.

On offense they want to get the ball the "Bullet" Avonte Davis' hands and score quickly. Force the other offense to keep scoring without having too many of their player sent to the hospital.

On the other side, the San Louis 49ers come into the match with a clear skill advantage. The league statisticians rate them at 1710 vs Legion's 1620. They are led by their legendary 7 strength ogre Leo Nomelini. On the field he is a beast but inside the San Louis community he contributes part of his earnings each game reeducation camps aimed at teaching youth the value of sports like Blood Bowl over mundane vocations like farming and blacksmith trades.The teams take the field with Coach Kondor and Coach Gotrek at mid field negotiating the coin toss with the referee. It is a home game for Legion so it will take a serious bribe for the 49ers to win the coin toss. Yep. As expected, Legion has won the toss and chosen to receive the ball.

As expected Legion gets the ball directly to Bullet who has settled in behind a solid screen of Legionnaires. The rest of the Legion have done a solid job knocking down 49ers. Oooh, look out. “Wolf Savage finds himself down and surrounded by Legionnaires. He is distracted. He has not assumed the recommended fetal position. Listen to the crowd! They see Knuckles sprinting toward Wolf. Its hard to tell. I think Knuckles stomped on the back of his neck. Signals from the sideline say he’s dead but the apothecary has not confirmed the diagnosis. Well, that’s too bad. The apothecary brought Wolf to his feet and they are limping to the locker room. Wolf will carry some scars from that one but he lives….for now.

At the signal of the referee play resumes and the Legion begins pummeling the 49ers once again. Max grabs the veteran Uzi and tears off the lineman’s helmet. Uzi has been niggled up and Max Murtair has begun beating the poor fellow with his own helmet. Uzi probably will not return to this game and Max has decided to take the helmet home as a souvenir. No one seems to notice but Bullet has scored the first touchdown of the game.

Both teams line up and now the 49ers will have a turn with the ball. They move down the southern sideline largely ignored by the legion. This time Klein is isolated away from the ball and he lost track of Knuckles. O’Daniel just knocked klein down and Knuckles is on top of him. That was a skillful boot! The ref saw it and raises the red card but Kondor intervened immediately. He is arguing that the beauty of that boot alone should be enough to keep Knuckles on the field. Perfect! The ref nodded his head and put the red card back in his pocket. My guess is that Klien will not return to the game either as the placement of the boot will certainly cause a groin injury.

Someone scored for the 49ers but who cares? This one is turning into a blood bath. The fans love it and so do I.

The half is coming to an end. Bullet has the ball again. Legion is working the Northern side of the field again. The 49ers are showing some spirit. Someone just blindsided Kalen Ballage. Tip of the cap to the 49er as Kalen is carried from the field. The hit distracted “Hoodoo” Brown and this time Seamus McFamous knocked him down. Smartly he started looking for Knuckles. He sees Knuckles coming but it will do no good. Seamus’ grip prevents him from defending himself. What a kick! Knuckles should try out as a kicker. That almost separated Hoodoo’s head from his shoulders. This time the apothecary is nowhere to be found. Hoodoo is dead, dead, dead!

Bullet just got his second score of the day. San Louis will get the ball back. No time to score but they surround a lineman. Listen to the crowd jeer. Bobby Evans just did a tap dance on the Legionnaire lineman. The foul was clearly a rookie effort that did not impress the judges. The red card puts Evans on the bench.

That will end an exciting first half of the game......

Welcome back everyone. If your wondering what happened in the second half, all I can say is that you should be glad you missed it. No blood and no scoring. The 49ers took the second half kick but failed to move the ball past mid-field. For their part, Legion could not get control of the ball and both their blocking and fouling lacked conviction. Sure, Knuckles committed 4 more fouls but he could not even stun anyone.

Please tune in again next week when the Legion will go on the road to face the White Wolves of Volkgrad in what promises to be another foul fest.”