“The Mary's Land Terrible Terrapins suffered a devastating loss in their opening game against the Rutgers Scarlet Hauers 2-0. The game was a rude awakening for the Mary's Landers entry into the SMACK, a loss that was compounded by career ending injuries to Jaiden Rising Sun and Tac-oma Park. Both Saurus are expected to never play the game of Blood Bowl again and will continue their studies elsewhere. With this loss the team has little where to turn, having essentially been eliminated from all competition.

The game started out terribly with the Scarlet Hauers getting the ball and quickly manhandling the Saurus. The apothecary for the Mary's Landers were quickly called out to help Ashley Land-Over who went down to a hard block on the first drive. Things went from bad to worse as first Jaiden Rising Sun went down and broke their ankle after a mighty block. The next play, Tac-oma Park suffered a grievous head injury. The Hauers strolled down the pitch, their armor easily deflecting the ineffective Terrapin blocks and keeping even the skinks from dodging away. At the end of the first half David Damascus went down to an injury, sealing the loss. Even at the end of the half the Hayden Laurel refused twice to leave the knock out tent, both times complaining of a continuing injury.

The second half started with the Terrapins desperately driving down the field with a series of handoffs and passes, one by newly minted chameleon skink O. Sean City. The Hauers reacted quickly, breaking through the flimsy screen of players that the Terrapins erected to try and protect ball carrier Jackson Airy. It was no use as the skink failed his dodge, even with additional coaching from the sideline staff. Jackson was eventually given a miss next game with a block during a desperate attempt to get the ball back.

The loan highlight of the game was in the middle of the second half as the Hauers were driving. Saurus Raymond Hagerston made an improbably dodge to blitz the ball carrier, knocking him to the floor and relieving him of the ball. The success was not to last as the Hauers quickly picked up an errant pass and marched down the field for the second score. After this game Coach Lancelott was found dejected on the sideline, shaking his head and refusing questions. Indeed, it looks to be a long season.”