“Training camp opened up for EMU teams this week, and the former backups from backwater were more than eager when an Elf team approached em with an offer of a match. Slightly confused, the Backups aren't use to elf teams offering them games, but soon decided, why not?

So they all trundled off to the pitch, and then they did their usual thing for 3 turns (standing around picking their rotting noses while the other team rips off an easy score). Then the backwater express got a chug chug chuggin along. The elfs put up bold resistence but when the ball somehow got stuck in a hole in Bilge Pumpin Barney's ribcage, it was all over but for the cryin and bleedin. So Barney the mummy skipped a do long day in for the score and the home crowd went crazy.

Second half started, and the backups were feelin pretty good. So off the snap Barney charged the elfs str 4 blitzer and deep 6'd him. The apo ran out to keep the liitle fellow from becoming a backwater benchwarmer, but Sockets the skeleton KO'd him out of the game with a followup foul. Coming off their drunks, the elves woke up and realized they were gonna die... all of them... deciding to leave without a cash prize but with their lives, they bowed out and run outta town.

Yeeeeeeeeeeehhhhaaaaaw!

EDIT: 4 fouls in 9 turns???? I'm barely trying to hurt yer team!”