“Well folks, the much awaited inaugural game for coach GrandNegus has resulted in a fitting draw. The Chandlers looked the better team for most of the game, and it was only after Countless recovered a dropped ball deep in their own territory late in the 2nd half and switched play to the northern wing did the tide turn. The coffin lids were banging dangerously close to dawn as blood-suckers all over the country celebrated the first touchdown for the club. Daisy was the toast of the underground after rushing 16 to cross into the elusive endzone.

Hank, Thrower for the Chandlers put in a sterling performance with rushing (6) and passing (9), but is was Blitzer Jack who kept pummeling the Countless (8 blocks) to clear the field.

Fans watching at home were gripped in horror as the line went dead just before the end of the game. While TV networks remain in court blaming each other for the technical difficulties, we are relived all you vamps got to bed before dawn.”