William was absolutely convinced that he was a mighty nordic warrior. However, his obscenely high weight and decidedly not-nordic origin always thwarted his dreams of joining a raiding band of Norsemen. Luckily for William that one of his drunken bar fights was with Derrick the zombie, leading him into a life of zombieism.

And undeath has been wonderful for his weight, making slim and muscular. He regularly goes on talk shows, speaks at public events, and has written numerous books advocating the 'Undead Diet'.