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Pointy Bits United
Retired [X] Dark Elf

GET TO THE POINT!


The Pointier the better! Spikes, nails, pikes, spears, in short anything that can be used to poke, prod or prick our enemies to death is good enough for us. We run with scissors. All the time...

- Coach Dagger 'Arghgedoffyagit' O'Stabs at the Pointy Bits United First Press Conference

While the team has had notable early successes against very tough opponents the bodies being wheeled away to the morgue after every match point to the problems with their dress code. Pointy Bits United's deadly uniforms consisting largely of spikes and blades. Very impressive, but deadly to the players themselves as well as the opponent.





<bold>Slicer I</bold> was brutally slain by his own helmet after failing a go for it.

Much to the delight of the fans, <bold>Slicer II</bold> was killed when a fan threw the new Slicer Action Figure (TM) at him. The apothecary said that thanks to the new "Slicer Death Move", (TM, AGES 3+) his death was both painful and more vicious than it otherwise would have been... Sales have since increased 232%.

Update: It was a chilly winter's day when Pointy Bits United travelled to Kislev to play in a competitive match against their first undead opponents. As the game started heavy snow blanketed the field and for many of the Dark Elf players it was to be their first (and last) experience with snow.

After slipping on a ice patch running for the endzone the Star Player 'Knives' was set upon by three Zombies, two Mummies and a Ghoul. When the team finally recovered most of his body to bring to the Apothecary they couldn't find him. Instead they found this note.
"Bugger this for a game of soldiers, I'm freezing my bits of. Am staying at the Imperial Hotel... in Altdorf.

Whips broke her leg on ice and only two players remained standing, largely frozen to the spot, at the end of the game. Said the Point Bits United Coach "Hmm, seems that Snow, Ice and cold don't work so well with pointy bits...".

Pointy Bits United also request the return of the partly eaten leg of Knives.
New Team Page Beta
Player Ma St Ag Av Skills Inj G Cp Td It Cs Mvp SPP Cost  
2
Dead Meat
Lineman
6 3 4 8   2 0 0 0 0 0 0/ 70k
(70)k
  
3
Jimmy the Snitch
Lineman
6 4 3 8
+ST
 -ag 8 1 0 0 1 1 8/ 120k
(135)k
  
4
SlicerIII
Lineman
6 3 4 8   7 1 0 0 2 0 5/ 70k
(70)k
  
5
Dicer
Lineman
6 3 4 7
Block
 -av 10 2 1 0 0 1 10/ 90k
(70)k
  
6
Dan 'The Ban' McMahon
Lineman
6 3 4 8
Guard
   11 2 0 0 1 1 9/ 100k
(100)k
  
7
Hungry Hannibal
Lineman
6 3 4 8
Kick
   11 6 0 0 1 0 8/ 90k
(90)k
  
8
Not so Harmless Harry
Lineman
6 3 4 8   11 0 0 0 1 0 2/ 70k
(70)k
  
9
Mad Jack MacMad
Lineman
6 3 4 8
Block
   10 2 1 0 0 1 10/ 90k
(90)k
  
11
Patrick Bateman
Lineman
6 3 4 8
Block
   10 3 2 1 1 0 13/ 90k
(90)k
  
9 players  
Coach: coachnecro Re-Rolls (100k): 3  
Race: Dark Elf Fan Factor: 4  
Current Team Value: 0k Assistant Coaches: 1  
Treasury: 110k Cheerleaders: 1  
Team Value: 1050k Apothecary: Yes  

Games Played:11 (5/3/3) |TD Diff:3 (24 - 21) |Cas Diff:-16 (6/4/1 - 15/8/4)
Last Opponent: Experiment B1456-0