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[X] Orc
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Chefs around the world have wondered how to create the perfect Orc team? Many have pioneered the techniques shown here, and to help the rest of the uninitiated here is the guide to a perfect Orc team. Now we can all 'enjoy' a team full of highly armoured clones, ideal for winning SMACK's and making a run at Majors. <i>Preparation time </i>: Ideally less than 60 minutes per match <i>Cooking time</i> : 10 to 30 games until ready ============================================== <big><b>INGREDIENTS</b></big> <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/oblackorc1.gif> <b>For the Black Orcs</b> <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/oblackorc1.gif> 440lb of mean, bad tempered Black Orc 6 SPP as soon as possible ST4, to compliment the bad temper Small amounts of movement, ball handling skill and IQ <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/oblitzer1.gif> <b>For the Blitzers</b> <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/oblitzer1.gif> 1 giant ego A heap of potential 1 sealed can of whoop-ass (To open) Sprinkling of stat increases <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/othrower1.gif> <b>For the Throwers</b> <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/othrower1.gif> A worrying lack of armour 2 chances to pick the ball up 110% reliability on ball handling <small>(110% reliability not guaranteed)</small> <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/olineman1.gif> <b>For the Linemen</b> <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/olineman1.gif> A good chance of death via the LoS 0.01 chance of getting an apothecaries help A hint of Dirty Player Some comfortable cushions (for warming the bench where they are likely to spend most of a match) <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/goblin1.gif> <b>For the Goblins</b> <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/goblin1.gif> 1 pair of flying goggles Small amount of life expectancy 1/2 tbsp of Troll-sauce to season T16 kicking boots <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/troll1.gif> <b>For the Troll</b> <img src=http://www.nicklovick.co.uk/01_Fumbbl/BB7/images/troll1.gif> .... erm.... ..... SMUSH!! .... <small>(Good enough for us!)</small> <big><b>METHOD</b></big> 1. Preheat the team to ~200TS/~200TR/Gas Mark 5. 2. Volunteer for SMACKS, Tours, SFC's and pickup games along the way. 3. Develop a team full of dull, clone, generic Orc players. <i><small>(Blitzers=Guard, Tackle, Mighty Blow, Repeat... Black Orcs=Block, Mighty Blow, Guard, Repeat, etc...)</i></small> 4. Add chainsaws, bombs, ball and chains and pogos for flavour. 5. Leave plenty of time for opponents reaction to your generic Orc team. Allow generous helpings of "cheese" and "whine". 6. Build up a solid fanbase and more cash in reserve than the average bank. 7. Bring to the boil for an upcoming major and set aside. ============================================== <big><b>Team Roster</b></big> 1. TROLL - Ainsley Harriott 2. BLITZER - Gordon Ramsey 3. BLITZER - Marco Pierre-White 4. BLITZER - Jamie Oliver 5. BLITZER - Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall 6. BLACK ORC - Kevin Woodford 7. BLACK ORC - Keith Floyd 8. BLACK ORC - Brian Turner 9. BLACK ORC - Antony Worral-Thompson 10. THROWER - Nigella Lawson 11. THROWER - Delia Smith 12. LINEMAN - Gary Rhodes 13. LINEMAN - Raymond Blanc 14. LINEMAN - Rick Stein 15. LINEMAN - Heston Blumenthal 16. GOBLIN - Rustie Lee ============================================== <big><b>Minors Records</b></big> None Entered ============================================== |
New Team Page Beta
| Player | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Inj | G | Cp | Td | It | Cs | Mvp | SPP | Cost | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| 1 |
Troll
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4 | 5 | 1 | 9 | Always Hungry, Big Guy, Mighty Blow, Really Stupid, Regenerate, Throw Team Mate |
1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/ | 100k
(94)k |
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| 2 |
Blitzer
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 9 | Block Tackle |
4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 11/ | 100k
(105)k |
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| 3 |
Blitzer
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 9 | Block |
4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2/ | 80k
(80)k |
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| 4 |
Blitzer
|
7 | 3 | 3 | 9 | Block +MA |
4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8/ | 110k
(125)k |
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| 5 |
Blitzer
|
6 | 4 | 3 | 9 | Block +ST |
4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 14/ | 130k
(153)k |
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| 6 |
Black Orc Blocker
|
4 | 4 | 2 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/ | 80k
(80)k |
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| 7 |
Black Orc Blocker
|
4 | 4 | 2 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5/ | 80k
(80)k |
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| 8 |
Black Orc Blocker
|
4 | 4 | 2 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3/ | 80k
(80)k |
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| 9 |
Black Orc Blocker
|
4 | 4 | 2 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/ | 80k
(80)k |
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| 12 |
Lineman
|
5 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/ | 50k
(50)k |
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| 13 |
Lineman
|
5 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/ | 50k
(50)k |
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| 14 |
Lineman
|
5 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2/ | 50k
(50)k |
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| 12 players | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| Games Played: | 4 (2/0/2) | | | TD Diff: | 1 (3 - 2) | | | Cas Diff: | 5 (7/1/1 - 4/0/0) |
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| Last Opponent: Sandforest | |||||||