| Player | Position | Games | SPPs | Skills | Injuries |
4 | Fungus the Loon | Fanatic | 0 | 0 | Ball & Chain, Star | |
12 | Trash | Black Orc Blocker | 0 | 0 | | |
12 | trash | Goblin | 0 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | |
12 | trash | Troll | 0 | 0 | Mighty Blow, Regenerate, Really Stupid, Throw Team Mate, Always Hungry, Big Guy | |
13 | free | Goblin | 0 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | |
12 | trash | Troll | 0 | 0 | Mighty Blow, Regenerate, Really Stupid, Throw Team Mate, Always Hungry, Big Guy | |
12 | Trash | Troll | 0 | 0 | Mighty Blow, Regenerate, Really Stupid, Throw Team Mate, Always Hungry, Big Guy | |
13 | Free | Goblin | 0 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | |
12 | Trash | Troll | 0 | 0 | Mighty Blow, Regenerate, Really Stupid, Throw Team Mate, Always Hungry, Big Guy | |
12 | trash | Black Orc Blocker | 0 | 0 | | |
12 | Trash | Troll | 0 | 0 | Mighty Blow, Regenerate, Really Stupid, Throw Team Mate, Always Hungry, Big Guy | |
12 | trash | Goblin | 0 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | |
13 | boot | Goblin | 0 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | |
12 | free | Troll | 0 | 0 | Mighty Blow, Regenerate, Really Stupid, Throw Team Mate, Always Hungry, Big Guy | |
13 | boot | Goblin | 0 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | |
12 | free | Troll | 0 | 0 | Mighty Blow, Regenerate, Really Stupid, Throw Team Mate, Always Hungry, Big Guy | |
14 | trash | Goblin | 0 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | |
13 | boot | Lineman | 0 | 0 | | |
12 | free | Lineman | 0 | 0 | | |
12 | Trash | Goblin | 0 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | |
12 | Trash | Troll | 0 | 0 | Mighty Blow, Regenerate, Really Stupid, Throw Team Mate, Always Hungry, Big Guy | |
12 | Trash | Black Orc Blocker | 0 | 0 | | |
12 | Trash | Lineman | 0 | 0 | | |
12 | Trash | Lineman | 0 | 0 | | |
13 | Trash | Black Orc Blocker | 0 | 0 | | |
12 | Ralf Nader | Lineman | 3 | 0 | | |
13 | trash | Lineman | 0 | 0 | | |
12 | Trash | Goblin | 0 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | |
4 | Hillary Clinton | Thrower | 33 | 59 | Pass, Sure Hands, +ST, +AG, +AG, +MA | d |
9 | Miss Rice | Lineman | 11 | 17 | Block, Kick | d |
8 | Dick Cheney | Lineman | 28 | 19 | Block, Tackle | d |
12 | Ralf Nader | Goblin | 2 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | |
11 | Der Kaiser | Lineman | 2 | 0 | | |
10 | Mrs. Albright | Lineman | 15 | 18 | Block, Dirty Player | n |
9 | Miss Rice | Lineman | 5 | 0 | | m, -ag |
8 | Dick Cheney | Lineman | 4 | 0 | | n |
7 | Karl Rove | Lineman | 12 | 16 | Block, Pro | m, n |
5 | George W. Bush | Black Orc Blocker | 38 | 36 | Block, Guard, Mighty Blow | m, -st |
4 | Hillary Clinton | Thrower | 6 | 6 | Pass, Sure Hands, Block | d |
2 | Bill Clinton | Blitzer | 31 | 33 | Block, Guard, Tackle, Piling On | m, n |
1 | Richard Nixon | Blitzer | 17 | 20 | Block, Guard, Dodge | d |