| Player | Position | Games | SPPs | Skills | Injuries |
8 | Greta Fist - miss hand | Chaos Dwarf Blocker | 2 | 0 | Block, Thick Skull, Tackle | m |
1 | Hugh Heffner junior | Hobgoblin | 12 | 9 | Guard | d |
4 | Jean Paul "the second makeup artist" | Hobgoblin | 12 | 5 | | m, n |
10 | Hellen hump - miss bum 07 | Chaos Dwarf Blocker | 11 | 0 | Block, Thick Skull, Tackle | m, n |
5 | Heidi Fine - Playmate of the year 07 | Chaos Dwarf Blocker | 23 | 23 | Block, Thick Skull, Tackle, Guard, Stand Firm | d |
10 | Andrea Flatbottom - mis April | Chaos Dwarf Blocker | 10 | 9 | Block, Thick Skull, Tackle, +AG | m |
9 | Pamela Humple - miss may | Chaos Dwarf Blocker | 37 | 43 | Block, Thick Skull, Tackle, +ST, Guard, Mighty Blow | m, d |
8 | Maya Blondbeard - miss June | Chaos Dwarf Blocker | 11 | 4 | Block, Thick Skull, Tackle | d |
7 | Ada Watermellon - miss November | Bull Centaur | 13 | 29 | Thick Skull, Sprint, Sure Feet, Stand Firm, Block | d |
6 | Jane Flower - miss December | Bull Centaur | 15 | 25 | Thick Skull, Sprint, Sure Feet, Break Tackle, Dodge | d |
4 | Maggie "makeupartist" | Hobgoblin | 11 | 11 | Dirty Player | m, -ma |
3 | Bill "the photografer" | Hobgoblin | 7 | 10 | Block | m, n |
1 | Hugh "the dwarflover" Heffner | Hobgoblin | 11 | 10 | Sure Hands | m, -ag |
2 | Mindy "the fat assistant" | Hobgoblin | 36 | 34 | Block, Dirty Player | -av, d |