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Past Players of Paradise Punchers
| Player | Position | Games | SPPs | Skills | Injuries | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 14 | Fredrick Fortune | Catcher | 2 | 0 | Catch, Dodge | d |
| 13 | Frank Fummble | Lineman | 2 | 0 | d | |
| 7 | Harvey Williams | Lineman | 6 | 0 | d | |
| 4 | Henry The Hammer Thorpe | Blitzer | 15 | 6 | Block, Guard | d |
| 4 | David Dirtbag Dundas | Lineman | 3 | 4 | n, d | |
| 3 | Victor Reeves | Blitzer | 20 | 34 | Block, +AG, Guard, Mighty Blow | n, d |
| 14 | Gavin Hastings | Blitzer | 2 | 0 | Block | n, m, -av |
| 13 | Harrison Lexus | Lineman | 10 | 16 | Mighty Blow, Block | n, m, -st |
| 3 | Tom Tough | Lineman | 4 | 5 | -av, m | |
| 7 | Phone Jacker | Catcher | 6 | 6 | Catch, Dodge, Diving Catch | d |
| 11 | Bruce Watson | Lineman | 36 | 22 | +MA, +ST | n, n |
| 10 | George Segal | Lineman | 19 | 9 | d | |
| 7 | Patrick Fitzpatrick | Lineman | 4 | 0 | m, n | |
| 4 | Gordon Flash | Blitzer | 11 | 13 | Block, Guard | n |
| 3 | Bob Ratchet | Blitzer | 7 | 15 | Block, Guard | d |
| 2 | Eddie Grant | Blitzer | 14 | 20 | Block, Mighty Blow, Guard | d |